Sorcha

Nothing's out of reach if you've got long arms.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

So I've had a #Rizzles Season 4 catch up marathon and I have some major issues with the changes in Jane's character. The fuuuuuck?!

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

I forgot twitter existed but I feel like you need to know that I'm so drunk my feet are numb. There you go. Happy Monday. Sunday. Whatever.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Pizza solves everything

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

#DRUNK

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

@alliechatwin how the hell did I miss the voting?! I never miss the voting!!! I am such a bad person.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Twitter! I forgot you existed! What's going down?

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Walk Like Rihanna is possibly the worst song I've ever heard. Shit concept, shit lyrics, shit tune, shit singers, shit band.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

@alliechatwin it's the funniest thing I've seen in ages! Thanks!

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

If there's one thing that never fails to make me cry with laughter in two seconds flat it's seeing Dawn Fucking Denbo on my screen.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Do you reckon the Queen ever wakes up and thinks "fucking sod it, I'm your sovereign and I am not getting out of bed today!" #QueenAtTheBBC

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Apple should give you the option of having headphones or a 40 million pound iTunes voucher. (That's how much they cost to replace).

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

I do have the Apple ones that came with my phone but they are the worst headphones in existence.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Snapped my headphones. There is no point to life anymore.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

@teganandsara come for a trip to Brighton, it's not far! I could totally be your tour guide.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Dreamt up the entire next Batman film. Had Madonna as the villain with killer red lips and amazing fashion sense. Why am I such a genius?

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

I demand to know who gets paid to write official parody twitter accounts. I want your job.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Jessie J just added a tour date for Brighton. Might die. Or wee. Either way, I need a ticket. SOMEONE HAVE PITY ON ME.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Left the lid off my moisturiser all night. Now it's a block of soap. WHY IS BEING A GIRL SO HARD.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

Plus an update, my first ever two day hangover was fucking horrendous. Tequila is not my friend. I hope this doesn't go into a third day.

[Sorcha @SorchaDean]

She still looks smoking but I'm genuinely starting to grieve Jessie J's hair. Gonna watch the Do It Like a Dude video and weep.