Sarchasm

Really bad humor, not always appropriate

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

No it’s not my dick that’s curved, it’s just so massive that space and time bend around it

[Kristen 🤍 @path0167]

#Need 🥺

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

We do these things not because they are easy, but because we thought they were

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

I have decided to just make jokes and be weird, so account will stay around for now. Thank you all for your concern I did not expect that, but it was great to hear <3

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

Had to briefly pause the 5 hour sexcapade with the esteemed lady to use the restroom, couldn’t hold back viagara falls

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@brattybunnyxox I haven’t seen the test results yet so I am in fact scared to do that

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@bluelephant5 I believe the reason is sex but don’t take my word for it

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

Can anyone play lo-fi beats on my schmeat?

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@gnosticse Everyone annoys me tbh

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

Now I’ve become dick, the destroyer of whores - Sloppyhinder I think

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

I’ve become the very thing I swore to destroy: in my feels

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@kaylatimexo Can you make an exception for me and make it say girl instead?

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@cryptofwitches I’m so sorry that really sucks (6’8, shredded, entrepreneur btw)

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@skyyxoh You don’t have DMs on for non-mutuals…

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

Is there a female equivalent to shrinkage?

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

Ur mom

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@honeytempt Mental idealization tailored to personal preferences going unchecked without outside influences acting in the imagination

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

Guy asking girl out, farm edition:

Guy - Cock-a-doodle-dooooo you want to go out with me sometime?
Girl - Neeeeeeiiiigh
Her friend - Mooooooove along buddy
Guy’s homie - Basaaaaaaahd luck man, next time
Guy - Cringes anytime he thinks of this interaction for the next five years

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@diepressedfr I don’t discriminate, I get hated by everyone

[Sarchasm @Spurnburn]

@sassylj44

[miss information @intelligentpawg]

she’s just wifeslop bro. you only like her because you’re attracted to her, respect her as a person, enjoy her company and could see yourself happily spending the rest of your life with her