Squanto'sFunFacts

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Gma just said she's never heard of Squanto. What the FUCK! #wtf #Kindamad

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

*White Man sees black clouds in sky* Don't you dare do a rain dance!

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Stuck a feather behind my ear, suddenly saw people running. But it was funny because I left my bow and arrows at home...

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

99.9% of native teenagers are evolving into black man gangsters. With your sagging pants, drugs, and rap music. All I did was plant corn....

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Many people ask me if I'm Mexican. Then I scalp them. Seems like a good enough answer.

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

I've been seeing Trail Of Tears history markers along the road. But why were the natives so sad? I hear Oklahoma's a wonderful state!

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Showing up and everyone yells "Squanto" instead of your real name. 😂

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

No comment needed.

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Chewing tobacco. You're welcome. #thankanative

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Happy Birthday @ViseWriedt420

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Natives are 177% more likely to die from diabetes than non-Natives. About 500% are more likely to die from tuberculosis. #diseasefreaks

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Approximately 36% of Native peoples with heart disease will die before the age of 65, compared to 15% of Caucasians. #WhoKnew

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Just found out my Native American Zodiac Sign is the Falcon. #notevenmad

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

The biggest lie I ever told "That hair would NOT look good on my belt." #scalpjoke https://t.co/dgMyDAv9TW

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

I hate seeing Asians walk out of Asian restaurants. Just make the shit at home! #notnative #asianlogic

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Dear women, stop stealing our ponytail idea. Thank you. #nativelogic

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

It's the Sky Gods my fellow man. https://t.co/sjleMIka0W

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Tempted to start a fire for warmth. #nativelogic #it's_fucking_cold

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

Back in the day, we didn't have balls, we used the skulls out of buffalo. #rezball

[Squanto'sFunFacts @SquantosFunFact]

You're 22 times more likely to be killed by a cow, than a shark.