Stampie Dear

Live. Laugh. Lobotomy.

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Took me until my mid-late 30’s to discover you can basically eradicate poison ivy overnight by just spraying the area with hydrogen peroxide 🙃

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

“What do you mean ‘touch grass’? My hand’s almost always on my bush”

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

I was raised in the smoking section of Buggaboo Creek

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

How do I go about telling a hairstylist I want Kylie Jenner’s baby hairs?

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

The most important part of this post is “you both follow jensonackles”

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Olive Garden just slid into my DM’s

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Bruh, I just wanna get dressed up on a Creed cruise and hit up the buffet…

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

The Duffer brothers have the biggest opportunity right now to let fans be pissed about @Stranger_Things while they develop a movie following the conformity theory

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

All I want for Christmas is a vintage small duffle style Louis Vuitton bag

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

I think Chinese food from the mall food court would heal me spiritually

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

This year, I will not let anyone tell me “how lame” the Christmas light show is…. I’m going

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

When the first season of stranger things came out I was platinum blonde to the goddamned root

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

When I need a political palate cleanser (which is often), I watch clips of George Dubyah

[໊ @user0000O0]

how it feels to say “girl whatever” instead of arguing

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Fall is when I revert to the classic “young widowed 90’s mom” look with vintage bootcut Levi’s, button up cardigans and flannel.

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

This year, I’ve learned a lot about returning energy. What you bring to me, you get back.

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Bruh - and then they announced this upcoming season being the final season just hours after I posted this

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

My manifestation prowess is v strong but v skewed because I did NOT mean I wanted Yellowjackets infesting my home

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

My manifestation prowess is v strong but v skewed because I did NOT mean I wanted Yellowjackets infesting my home

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

This summer, we’re not playing mermaids; we’re playing Yellowjackets.

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Trying to turn the bad days into baddie days

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

Hear me out: Tilda Swinton as Jane Goodall in bio pic

[Stampie Dear @StampHERface]

After the *accidental* shortest cut of my entire adult life, 2years later (plus daily biotin, leave in hemp based conditioner, sleeping with braids, soft bristle brush, minimal to no heat) my hair is finally at a Practical Magic length again