Starla Collins

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Nasty ass matt healy (he doesn't deserve to be a proper noun) makes me feel like I need to shower. I once had a rebound that I'm pretty sure had fleas. 😂 #TTPD

[aram 🐏 @aramnotagoat]

North West listening to thanK you aIMee with Kim tomorrow morning…

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Calling #Nelnet is where a Karen really feels at home. I let that bitch out of her cage, and she's running around wild ruining mine and everyone else's day.

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Spent way too long watching 259 pigeons harmoniously eat a whole ass pizza that somebody left them at the Chicago Cultural Center. They were so gracious. #Chicago

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Slammed the door in a salesman's face to grab my dogs, then went out later to fill up bird feeders with no bra on. Is she a bird nerd? Is she a hoe? No, she's #Karen and I hate her too.

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

The office construction worker who just saw me licking cappuccino foam off a stir stick is also the same one who saw me apply an extra coat of deodorant. This #ADHD bitch is ready for the day!

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Charles falling asleep on the plane home without a neck pillow. @NBAonTNT

[MISSINGLaurenSpierer @NewsOnLaurenS]

Happy Birthday, Lauren. 🥹💔 #FindLauren

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

The lady at the antique store and I were trying to figure out why that Beatles album cover was completely white... 😂😂😂 "Can I have that one where they're crossin' the street?" #ImTheProblem

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Julius... read the room. 😂😂😂

[New York Basketball @NBA_NewYork]

Wait for it

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Yay it's that episode of #TheOffice where I wish Pam would just screw the camera guy already. Sometimes, you just need to turn that shit into Melrose Place. Angela was ready to shine. #ImTheProblem

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

@AOC did you all let this old and confused man sell our loans to Western Sky? This is getting really sketchy with #Nelnet. Can I just write in Boebert's boob dress for my vote next year? The dress never let any of us down.

[The Debt Collective 🟥 @StrikeDebt]

This isn’t hyperbole. Since student debt payments resumed, the Department of Education has wrongfully drawn cash from people’s bank accounts. Even folks who have never signed up for auto-pay. This is just theft by greedy student loan servicers, greenlit by the Biden admin.

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

My fiance put Star Wars on, and now I have so much anxiety watching them all possibly be smashed between two walls. "I just like the parts with that big bear and/or all those little bears. Just make it about them."

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

To that girl selling rubber "positivity" bracelets on the streets of Chicago, my broke, Karen ass has told you several times that I am not giving you money. Isn't there a benefit to having this unfriendly face??? #Karen #Chicago

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Not surprised. Those Westville people are country, sturdy, and they mean business. Don't mess with a bitch wearing a puffy vest over her hay bailing shoulders who's late for her next MLM gathering.
https://t.co/ThsHDRxW5h

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Who would let George Santos hold a baby???
George Santos launches profanity-laced tirade on pro-Palestinian activist who accosted him while he carried a baby: 'Human scum' https://t.co/KJq1Z8ewCu via @nypost

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Good Lord the old lady sitting on the seat of her rollator walker screaming on her phone about BLM and MAGA... Somebody come get their #MarjorieTaylorMeeMaw out of that store before it's time to change her diaper...

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

To whoever the fuck makes the birthday cake KitKat, you're gonna be fine. We'll ride through this together. I'm always right here.
Weight loss-aiding drugs Ozempic and Wegovy are dampening food sales, top Walmart exec says https://t.co/AvFDXNqmKR

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

The repair man is impressed with how loud my dogs can bark. Yep... #ReactiveDogs

[Starla Collins @StarlaCollins]

Today's unpopular opinion: Basements are for trashy people. I feel like everybody I knew with a flooded basement was trashy.