Stephen B. Bagley

Author: Floozy Comes Back, Undying, Tales from Bethlehem, Murder by Dewey Decimal, Murder by the Acre & Floozy.
Editor/author: Blackbirds 1st, 2nd,3rd Flights

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

Proud to be the 2,940th 😎 on @BackerKit for Mercedes Lackey's Deluxe "Heralds of Valdemar". https://t.co/KIziHDBhOF

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

I brewed my own root beer. The supplier said it tasted so good, you didn't need sugar. I had to add a sweetener. Even then, that root beer was strong. Grow hair on your eyeballs, it would. Now use my SodaStream and make carbonated water to use. Why make root beer? Well, why not?

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

I want life to slow down. I want time to read, play, nap, and snack on cookies and milk. Apparently, I want to go back to kindergarten. And I want to go now.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

You know, I don't get enough credit for my forbearance and not throat-punching the people who deserve it throughout my day.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

A friend of mine says she's always sincere. That must be a terrible way to live. I find insincerity and sarcasm are quite helpful in many situations.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

So...a friend asked me why I didn't put forth Mothra as a candidate for Pope, and I, quite seriously, said the Catholic Church didn't allow female priests, so they wouldn't select a female pope. I don't know why that was so funny. Still baffled.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

I want to walk so that I can be healthy. And when I do, I will take a taco with me because let's be honest about who we're dealing with here.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

When you're discouraged, I want you to remember that somewhere out there is someone who is thinking of you and how you have enriched their life. Not me, of course, but there's someone out there who feels that way about you. Just not me.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

A friend of mine says she's always sincere. That must be a terrible way to live. I find insincerity and sarcasm are quite helpful in many situations.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

I wouldn't kill for a diet Dr Pepper, let's make that completely clear, but a bit of minor maiming ... maybe ... depends on whether it had crushed ice or not.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

I don't drink coffee to survive other people. I drink coffee so other people can survive me.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

Some lines in the song are so horribly wise and desperately hopeful that they break parts of my heart. "...the horizon is all we have..."

https://t.co/rghdvXgt9r

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

I often find people confusing. Biblical scholars say God cursed the earth with sickness, pain, and sorrow when Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden. I think He cursed us with other people, too.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

When you post mean things, add the smiley after it so they'll know you're joking. Like this: "Die, you swamp-sucking pig-faced batweasel! 🙂" That makes it okay.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

A friend of mine--who is self-admittedly a bit critical of life--was challenged by his wife to go a day without criticizing anything.
"So how long did you go?" I asked.
He sighed. "I immediately said I didn't think it was a good idea."
He's going to have to work on that.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

Sometimes, the first step toward forgiveness is to recognize the other person is a nincompoop, will always be a nincompoop, can only do nincompoop actions, will only say nincompoop things, and is doing the best a nincompoop can do with their nincompoop capacities, bless 'em.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

When I was a kid in school, my teacher was telling us how she didn't date much when she was younger.
Before I thought, I asked, "Was it because you were mean then, too?"
Yes, I got punished. Which, I think, proved my point about her meanness.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

Let's be clear: I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was blaming you.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

A particular person--for whatever reason--keeps trying to put me in my place. You can do that, you know. But trust me, I won't stay there long, and I will show up in all sorts of places afterward.

[Stephen B. Bagley @StephenBBagley]

📷
"But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows."~Luke 12:7.
Comparing sparrows to humans, they are quarrelsome, greedy, and lustfully stupid. Sparrows, however, seem nice, but I don’t know much about them