Stephen Gardella

Small Twitter Owner.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

I'm not looking for a job, but if I am in the future I'd like to say hi to the HR people who scrolled down here searching for "red flags."

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

Update to my Jan. 29 tweet:

Two months later, this should be my 1602nd tweet, but instead it's my 1599th.

Did @Twitter delete 3 of my old tweets?

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

This is my 1601st tweet. Going to check back in a few weeks to see if it's still my 1601st tweet.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

"No."

- my doctor's email reply to me, verbatim, after I emailed to ask if I needed a second mRNA booster since my initial vaccine dose was Johnson & Johnson

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

"Andrew, I was unqualified. I was unqualified."
@karaswisher to @AndrewYang, on the 9/30 episode of her podcast "Sway," on why she decided NOT to run for mayor of San Francisco

Yang's response?

"Is that REALLY a reason not to do it, Kara?"

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

My Indicator Of The Week is 8, which is the number of days since a new episode of @theindicator appeared my @ApplePodcasts app.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

After the iOS 14.6 iPhone update, I'm unable to use the @ApplePodcasts app to listen to any podcast episodes released AFTER Thursday 6/3/2021 because those episodes aren't appearing on the app.

That's one weird update.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

So I was kind of right about this? But not for the reasons I thought? Or the reasons any of you think now either.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

After reading that Anna Delvey article, I’ve concluded that NYC (all of it!) is a giant ponzi scheme that’ll collapse in less than 3 years.

Happy Wednesday!

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

Feeling very Gen X because my boomer relatives are fully vaccinated and my millennial wife has her first shot on Friday while I can't get an appointment.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

"If you’d been in the market at the March 2009 bottom, you’d be rich now!"

- The Financial Media, every day between 2010 and Feb. 2020

"Why are all these idiots in the market?! They're irrationally driving it up!"

- The Financial Media, every day since the March 2020 bottom

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

If you’re not a liberal at 20, you have no heart. If you’re not a conservative at 40, it’s because a bunch of fucking armed yahoos just stormed the Capital, so you know what? Fuck the Republican Party.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

Everyone: If you're suffering from depression, please seek help.

(Person has depression, takes this advice, seeks help.)

Everyone: Sorry dude, you're on your own. It's 2020, we ALL have depression!

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

You have to be 1000 times more insane to run for NYC Mayor than US President. This, in my opinion, disqualifies anyone running for NYC Mayor as a reasonable choice for NYC Mayor.

[Kate Helen Downey @katehelendowney]

@sasimons The UCB model also hurts other comedy venues - they’ve become the “standard”, which means if you try to charge more than $5 or $10 for a ticket, many folks (including performers on the show!) freak out. Not possible to build a sustainable business on that.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

I'm going to start posting my Twitter drafts to @LinkedIn, just to keep the rest of 2020 interesting.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

Maybe I'll dump all of my drafts on here soon so you can all say "Wow, that's a solid B/B- tweet from 2015."

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

Most of my draft folder tweets are meaningless dreck compared to the events of 2020, but there's this one:

"Russia electoral interference judo with USA"

...and damn it, I wish I remembered what I was going for there.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

It's the last tweet I put my drafts folder, so it's my most recent "Maybe this will work?" half thought. It's right after this one:

"Will Arnett voiceovers are actually Bojack Horseman."

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

It takes a special kind of hubristic assholery to release a book called “American Crisis: Leadership Lessons from the Covid-19 Pandemic” while WE’RE STILL IN THE PANDEMIC.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

I wish @Bourdain were here to see this.

[Stephen Gardella @StephenGardella]

"I'm socially liberal and fiscally conservative" is something Carter Burke would tell Ripley in Aliens.