Steve Maupin

Tennis Coach, Tennis Player, Husband, Father, P1, Stars Fan

[OkieMaga_Patriot46 @Okie_Patriot46]

I need to make a very PUBLIC announcement on behalf of younger GenXers and older Millennials.

If you see someone in their 40s or 50s who seems a little boring now, I need you to understand something...

We already got it in.

Like...GOT. IT. IN.

We are not sitting home on a Friday night because we never knew how to have fun.
We are sitting home on a Friday night because we have seen enough.

We went to parties in houses that should have been condemned and were almost certainly owned by the local drug dealer.

We saw police lights and RAN and not across a nice, flat field.
INTO THE WOODS.

Do you understand the athleticism required to hurdle uprooted tree roots in platform shoes while simultaneously trying to keep your low-rise jeans from sliding completely off your ass?

And somehow...we never spilled the Zima. We never spilled the Boone’s Farm.

That was TALENT.

We slept on floors in strange houses because the designated driver either never showed up or, in a shocking turn of events, was drunker than everybody else.

There was no Uber, Life360 or Find My Friends.
There was just somebody named Mike saying, “I know a shortcut.”

And we FOLLOWED MIKE.

We closed down bars and then decided the night was still young, so we drove to Atlantic City, where we somehow managed to get drunk, sober up, get drunk again, sober up again and then get drunk a THIRD TIME before breakfast.

And according to our parents? We were at Michelle’s house.

Eating pizza and watching movies.

Michelle’s mother unknowingly covered for approximately 17 people every weekend. If there even was a Michelle.

We drank things called Purple Passion, Mad Dog 20/20 and whatever somebody mixed inside a giant plastic garbage can. Nobody asked what was in it. You grabbed a red Solo cup and trusted the process.

We went to clubs until the lights came on. Do you know the psychological damage of seeing a nightclub with the LIGHTS ON? Nothing good happens after those lights come on.

We danced for four straight hours in shoes that permanently altered the structure of our feet.

We made entire plans without cell phones...no texts, dropped pins or group chats...just an extremely questionable sense of direction.

We rode in cars with 11 people when the vehicle legally seated five. Someone was always sitting on someone. Someone was always in the hatchback.
And there was always one friend yelling, “DUCK!” when we passed a cop.

So yes...now we like being home.
We like sweatpants.
We like cancelling plans.
We like saying, “That sounds fun!” with absolutely no intention of attending.
We like restaurants at 5:30 because we can get a good table.
We like being home by 8:17.

And if someone texts at 9:30 PM and says, “What are you doing?”
Sleeping...we are sleeping.

Because this is not boring my friends...this is retirement.

We already played, partied and danced on the bar.
We already ran from the cops through a wooded area dressed like a Spice Girl.

We have stories that cannot be posted because there are still people with careers, marriages and reputations to protect. And thank GOD there were no camera phones.

So kids, when you look at your Gen X and older Millennial parents sitting peacefully on the couch watching Dateline at 8 PM and think:
“God, you guys are boring.”

Sweetheart...oh sweetheart.
You are looking at retired legends.

Put some respect on our names. We're probably the reason Life360 was invented.

xoxoxo (posted from someone else on FakeBook) 🤣 #genx #oldandtired

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Don’t pass on generational trauma

[Steve Maupin @Steve_Maupin]

@SportsSturm Let’s ask Guy Sportts with two “T”s!! 😂😂

[Flopping Aces @FloppingAces]

America’s ruling class has performed another miracle.

They took the most basic truths in human civilization ... crime needs punishment, borders need enforcement, schools should teach, welfare should be temporary, families matter, merit matters, and taxpayers should not be looted by professional parasites ... and somehow rebranded all of that as “extremism.”

Incredible work, really.

Apparently, a “compassionate” society is one where the violent repeat offender gets another chance, the victim gets a candlelight vigil, the taxpayer gets the bill, the schoolkid gets passed along illiterate, the fraudster gets a grant, the NGO gets another contract, the illegal alien gets services, and the working American gets told to shut up and be more inclusive.

What a beautiful system.

Soft justice did not stay in the courtroom. It metastasized. It became soft borders, soft schools, soft parenting, soft welfare, soft standards, soft men, and soft bureaucrats explaining why every obvious solution is “too harsh.”

Lock up predators? Cruel.
Deport illegals? Hateful.
End generational welfare? Lacking empathy.
Punish fraud? Complicated.
Restore merit? Problematic.
Teach kids to read? Probably colonialism by Tuesday.

A serious country protects the innocent from the guilty. A decaying country protects the guilty from consequences and makes the innocent finance the experiment.

That’s America’s real crisis.

Not poverty. Not “root causes.” Not another fake expert panel.

Consequences.

We stopped imposing them on the people destroying the country, so now the country imposes them on everyone else.
(article below)

[Steve Maupin @Steve_Maupin]

@ESPNPR @andyroddick @espn @Served_Podcast @andyroddick Destined to happen and smart move by ESPN. His podcast and live commentary during matches is great and very insightful. Though he’ll have to save his Sweetens Cove for off camera! 😂😂

[Kendall Baker @kendallbaker]

This is crazy

(via @LevAkabas)

[Saint Zoe 🇺🇸🇭🇹 @Jupinapapi3]

Fernando Mendoza looks like he makes his animal crackers fight each other before he eats them

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

NFL Announces Each Quarter Of Playoff Game Will Be Broadcast On Different Streaming Service https://t.co/0jw9ZMSmYd

[Steve Maupin @Steve_Maupin]

@KBTXRusty @gordonkeith time send Nolan Ryan with the Hershey’s kisses. He’ll solve this (Nolan voice) expeddushhhus…..expurdussslusss….fast.

[Thomas Sowell Quotes @ThomasSowell]

"Well, first of all, tell me, is there some society you know that doesn't run on greed...?

— Milton Friedman

[Empire State Building Observation Deck @EmpireStateBldg]

Rest in Peace Lord Vader

[Benson George🇨🇦 @B3n3on]

Personally, I think @Served_Podcast is hands down one of the best things that has ever happened to the Tennis community & it is totally underrated at the moment. Checkout this podcast to find out yourself #Puregold 🎾

https://t.co/jjdvQkm5E5

[JJ Watt @JJWatt]

If I was building a football stadium,
Kyle Field is the template I would start with.

[Steve Stewart-Williams @SteveStuWill]

“Tough math teachers get lower ratings from students, because students like them less. However, students get better grades with the tough teachers than with laxer teachers. Reason #167 why student evaluations of teaching aren’t particularly useful.” https://t.co/rtyBRXjntE

[Jonathan Haidt @JonHaidt]

Kids in religious families have fared better in the smartphone era, with smaller rises in mental illness. @ZachMRausch and I believe it is primarily due to being anchored in real-world communities with rituals and obligations, low anomie. Thanks @frasernelson...

[Carol Roth @caroljsroth]

Important details re “job creation” - stats aren’t always what they seem

[Jeff Blehar is *BOX OFFICE POISON* @EsotericCD]

Out on the town having the time of my life with a highly engaged and witty Joe Biden in full possession of his faculties. He's just out of frame, being sharp.

[Mark Hamill @MarkHamill]

Still too soon... 😭

#RoastedRelatives

[Steve Maupin @Steve_Maupin]

@andyroddick @Served_Podcast As a high school tennis coach, I’ve gotten to try many different brands of rackets and I’ve been very impressed with the @yonex_tennis and Diadem rackets. The Diadem customer service and product line is outstanding. Yonex VCore or EZone Tour or Diadem Elevate Tour.

[Steve Maupin @Steve_Maupin]

@therecount @andyroddick I hate the way our legislative system works. Why is it “killing bipartisan border bill”? There’s foreign aid to Israel and Ukraine in there and much more so in funding. Why isn’t it framed as “killing Israel aid bill”? Media is just as corrupt pushing this BS. @andyroddick