Special announcement ‼️
Them just do small thing on my head just now.
Woman just bought me two kilos of turkey! Two whole kilos!
She hasn't made her intentions known yet but my answer is going to be YES, I mean why else would she buy me such?
Make I go shave down, incase she calls me to come and repay her generosity.
Modern culture shames men for doing the "bare minimum."
Let us translate what that phrase actually means today. It means a man is refusing to act as an unpaid entertainer and a financial sponsor for someone who brings nothing to the table except endless demands. The moment a man stops competing for conditional attention, his character is attacked.
The men stepping away from the dating market are refusing to participate in a one-sided transaction. They have finally realized that paying for the privilege of being disrespected is a catastrophic investment.
"Men just need to open up and be more vulnerable."
It’s the most popular piece of relationship advice on the internet right now, and for many men, it is a complete trap.
The uncomfortable truth is that society begs men to drop their armor, but punishes them the second they actually do. When a man shows raw panic, deep fear, or genuine weakness, the dynamic almost always shifts. The subconscious starts to fade and the "ick" starts to sets in. And those moments of vulnerability are quietly cataloged in a vault, waiting to be weaponized against him during the next argument.
Men don't need a shoulder to cry on in a system that views their suffering as an inconvenience. They need solid boundaries, a brotherhood of other men who can help them fix the actual problem, and the cold realization that their peace must come from within, never from an audience.
A woman can spend her entire twenties making reckless choices, accumulating debt, engaging in toxic relationships, and treating people like disposable commodities, only to enter her thirties with a clean cultural slate.
Society labels her past as a "healing journey." Her mistakes are excused as the byproduct of trauma, bad timing, or bad men. She is given an endless reservoir of institutional and cultural grace.
A man is granted zero margin for error.
A man can build a business for twelve years, pay his bills on time, support an entire extended family, and show up every single day without complaint. But the exact second he makes one financial miscalculation, exhibits one moment of emotional exhaustion, or fails to meet an escalating standard of lifestyle maintenance, the verdict is instant and permanent. His entire history of sacrifice is erased overnight. He is immediately classified as a failure, a deadbeat, or an inadequate partner.
We pratice an empathy cartel not an empathy deficit in modern relationships. We have an empathy cartel. Grace is distributed exclusively based on gender. Men are judged under strict liability, where intent, past loyalty, and external conditions are completely irrelevant. .
Let us be completely honest about what modern dating has become: an unregulated financial extraction market disguised as romance.
A generation of women has been conditioned by social media algorithms to believe that their mere existence entitles them to a fully funded lifestyle. Most modern women do not want a partner. They want an economic umbrella that protects them from the harsh realities of adult responsibility while contributing zero tangible value to the relationship.
Look at the standard modern dynamic. A man is expected to arrive at the table financially established, emotionally indestructible, mentally sorted, and ready to cover every dining tab, vacation, and emergency expense. In return, he receives fluctuating hormones, weaponized silence, and the constant reminder that someone else in her direct messages is ready to take his place.
The moment a man asks what a woman actually brings to his life outside of physical proximity and aesthetic decoration, he is met with fury "i am the table",. The question itself is treated as an insult.
The men who are pulling out of the dating market are not bitter or unmotivated. They have simply run the numbers. They realize that trading forty hours of grueling weekly labor just to rent the conditional tolerance of someone who resents their boundaries is the worst investment an adult can make.
Till today, nobody talks about the quiet physical starvation of the modern man.
A man can easily go two, five, or seven years without a single human being touching him in a way that is not transactional. No embrace when he walks through the door, no gentle hand resting on his shoulder, no back pats and no unearned physical affection.
Every touch he receives has something attached to it: a date paid for, a crisis handled, or an expectation met.
We have built a culture where men are treated as hazards by default, so they learn to pull their limbs inward, keep their distance in public, and exist inside an emotional perimeter. When a human body goes years without warmth, It numbs itself to survive.
So before society lectures men on why they seem emotionally distant or cold, it needs to ask when was the last time anyone held them without demanding something in return.
A woman has just given birth.
Everybody is happy. Then suddenly, she starts bleeding.
This is postpartum haemorrhage, and when it happens, no one has time to ask where the drug, tranexamic acid or TXA is.
That drug, Tranexamic acid can help reduce deaths from bleeding when it is given early after PPH starts.
So if a facility is providing emergency obstetric care, TXA should not be something they start looking for when the emergency has started.
It should be there.
As a man, if your wife is preparing to give birth, ask if the facility has TXA available. Same thing if you’re pregnant and preparing for delivery.
Ask questions. Know what is available.
Prepare before the emergency comes.
RT so that expectant mothers and fathers can see this very important message.
Source: Data, provided by @womenadvocate and @LSHTM.
Twenty-four years after I attended my first Annual General Conference as a newly called lawyer and watched the baton of leadership pass to a new President, I stood before the same Association today to receive it myself.
I receive this office with gratitude for those who ran before me, humility for the trust placed in me, and a solemn determination to run my own leg faithfully.
May it be said, when this tenure is over, that the Bar became bolder; that lawyers felt seen, protected and empowered; and that we left the Nigerian Bar Association stronger than we met it.
The work begins today.
Oyinkansola Badejo-Okusanya, SAN
33rd President, Nigerian Bar Association
Dolly Parton is dead, and the church never knew what to do with her.
Half my feed is posting rhinestones today. The other half never trusted her, because she would not wear the uniform.
She never preached a sermon.
She just did the works.
One man. Fifty-eight years. In an industry that eats marriages. No scandal reel, no reality show, no trading up. Just Carl, and a promise kept until death did them part.
She could have built towers in Nashville. Instead she built in the mountains she came from, so the people she came from could work.
Two hundred million books. Given away to children, free, no strings, while the rest of us argued about what to read.
A million dollars for a vaccine in the middle of a plague, and she called it what it was: helping.
She was a feminist who never used the word, a superstar who never left home, and a believer who never made you watch her pray.
"Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works." James 2:18.
We spent years asking whether she was one of ours.
She never asked whether we were one of hers. She was too busy feeding children.
I do not know her heart. That was never my job. I know her works, because the whole county she came from lives on them.
"Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them." Matthew 7:20.
You want to honor her today? Put down the tribute post. Put a book in a kid's hands. Stay married. Do the works.
That was the whole sermon. She just never said it out loud.