Barney Stinson

Barney Stinson, I wear suits and I'm awesome. #TrueStory. Parody Account. Not here for your lame relationship tweets. [email protected]

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#SexIsGoodWhen you don't remember her name.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#YouNeedToUnderstandThat suits > snapbacks

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#BadDecision having a girl stay at your apartment until it gets light outside

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#HowToReplyToILoveYou are you trying to Mosby me?

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

“@AlexPosts: I love my girlfriend 😍😍😍 isn't she beautiful 😘 http://t.co/wH29J3Jg”
I can't wait till you break up and you cry more than her.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

Snapbacks, please #LeaveItIn2012. You all look insanely stupid.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#NameALegend Barney Stinson #Legendary

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#SignsHesCheating you've become a lot crazier, but no hotter.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

That's just like a public dry-humping.... @illposts

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

Well damn, @AlexPosts blocked me.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

All I got from that was "I have a vagina" @AlexPosts

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

You're* @AlexPosts and that emoji is a horse...

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#InThisGeneration kids are thinking snapbacks, swag, and emotional tweets are the ways to get girls.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#RelationshipsWouldLastLongerIf you would "last longer", if you know what I mean.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#5ThingsIFindAttractive boobs. And 3 more boobs.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#MentionSomeoneYouAreAfraidOfLosing Brover

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#IfWereTogether you'd better leave before breakfast.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#RelationshipsEndBecause you follow the advice of some swag kid on Twitter.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#RelationshipsEndBecause they start.

[Barney Stinson @StinsonParody]

#MentionSomeoneYourThankfulFor anyone who can start a grammatically correct trending topic.