Karan

Shit don’t matter

[Karan @StressSzn]

Dorgu needs to get boomed

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🚨💣 BREAKING: Carlos Baleba to Manchester United, here we go! Verbal agreement in place between clubs.

Improved bid sent today after £65m package rejected and player set to join the only club he wanted.

Baleba, new #MUFC player soon. 🇨🇲

[Smiley @30GotNext]

Inde Navarrette, Sadie Sink and Samara Weaving all on my screen

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

Always a big Red ♥️🤍

Introducing our 2026/27 @adidasFootball third kit 🖇️

[🦅 @deadboylyfee]

Happy retirement brodie🙏🏽

[nav ྀིྀི ☭🇮🇳 | mourning jones @draculauras17]

they’d force him to pick a football team on week 2 and by week 3 all the other fans would kill him

[S @stx4__]

how Arsenal fans were discussing the logistics of Vini image rights and bonuses for 2 weeks

[Video Tayfa @videotayfa]

Spiderman - peter parker - loser - edit

[Ursen @Ursen_]

Discovered the world that is ConnorEatsPants Letterboxd reviews lately

[sheku. 🇵🇸🇸🇩🇨🇩 @shekuwow]

#snatchedthatniggaschainicantlie

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I mentioned that my garage door was making a sound.

An American immediately said, "I got a guy."

He did not ask what the sound was. He did not ask what kind of door. He produced a guy on the basis of the word garage.

I asked who the guy was.

He said, "Just a guy."

He did not have a company name. He had a first name and a phone number in his phone saved as "Mike Garage."

That is the contact name. Mike Garage. As though Garage is his surname. As though there is a family.

I asked how he found this guy.

"My brother-in-law used him."

I asked if the brother-in-law was satisfied.

He thought about it. Then he said, "He's still standing."

The house is still standing. That is the entire review.

Inside I said: THEY DO NOT KEEP RECORDS. THEY KEEP LOYALTIES.

I called Mike Garage. He answered from inside a vehicle. There was wind. He said he could come Tuesday between eleven and four.

Between eleven and four. A window of five hours. In my country this would be a scandal. Here it is generous. He gave me a window at all. Some guys do not give you a window. Some guys say "Tuesday" and that is the whole appointment.

He came at 1:40.

He fixed it in twenty minutes. He charged me less than I expected and he did not take a card, only cash or an app I had never heard of.

Before leaving he looked at my water heater, which I had not mentioned, and said, "That's gonna go."

I asked when.

"Couple years."

I asked what I should do.

He said, "I'll give you a guy."

He gave me a guy. Mike Garage has a guy. The guy has a guy. There is a network beneath this country made entirely of men named after their function, and none of them advertise, and all of them are busy.

Inside I said: THERE IS A SECOND NATION HERE. IT HAS NO SIGNS. IT IS ENTERED ONLY BY INTRODUCTION.

I have been given four guys since.

I have a guy for trees.

I did not know I needed a guy for trees.

I have trees now, apparently. They are my responsibility. A man named Rick told me so and then left.

[redacted @K0MODOS]

Palantir Parker stealing New Yorkers private information and selling it to Reed Richards for NVIDIA GPUs. He’s a terrorist

[HC @HCfootball01]

I’m never ever deleting this app

[L7 | Petey @peteyburn]

Kinda funny that if ur religion loses enough wars it gets downgraded to mythology after a generation or two

[COOLEE BRAVO @ItalianFiesta]

Juicy ass lobster lmaoo I’ll pour butter on her ass. Stop tweakin

[. @NeonGenesisSc]

Backrooms (2026) - Ending with Parallel Scenes

[🦇 @gothamkino]

#NW

[gulvinder @rebelliousdogra]

I gave them all her details. Sorry friends. Sorry Yalina 🙏

[Philadelphia 76ers @sixers]

a city fit for a king.

welcome to Philly, @KingJames

@bankofamerica