kels

[jigga. @KingLetty_]

This >>>> https://t.co/NgVIZETtAZ

[Ben Conarck @conarck]

My 89 y/o grandmother, who is isolated at home in CT, just told me she reads the replies to my tweets and then investigates the profiles of people who leave rude replies. So don’t be mean to me or my grandma will judge you.

[Humor @HumorTV__]

Anxiety is like experiencing failure in advance.

[Dylan Wheeler @DylanWheeler_]

The perfect quarantine schedule,

4:00 - Wallow in self pity
4:30 - Stare into the abyss
5:00 - Solve world hunger (tell no one)
5:30 - Jazzercise
6:30 - Dinner with me (I cant cancel that again)
7:00 - Wrestle with my self loathing

[jp @excesstential]

My dad can get into “dad-mode” sometimes. He’s a doctor who is worried about the virus, and told me, his 24 year old son, in a 5 min rant that this isn’t the time to be trying to have a lot of “play-dates”. So if you were trying to play after school im sorry my dad said we cant

[James @CaucasianJames]

time to brush my teeth and hit the hay. will i floss? idk maybe. dentist if ur reading this eat rocks dude. ur so fake to me it’s unbelievable. can’t stand u man. okay goodnight

[no way @helloitscorrie]

On this day 13 years ago, Britney Spears shaved her head for our sins.

[vs @versuslll]

I hate when I go out in public and the public be there

[Colorado Mammoth @MammothLax]

FIRST CAREER NLL GOAL FOR JAKE MCNABB!!! 🎉

Down by 2.

#TuskUp https://t.co/TPZUAWludc

[Ariana Angeles @ArianaAngeles_]

post malone dancing to shania twain :-,) #AMAs #PostMalone

[🌻 c h l o é h a y d e n 🌻 @chloeshayden]

THREAD OF PLACES YOU CAN DONATE TO HELP AUSTRALIA’S BUSHFIRES

[🫥 @Nosoycuero]

This is my energy from now on.

[James @CaucasianJames]

life hack: bring iceberg lettuce to the bar and take a big bite out of it after every drink to stay hydrated and avoid a hangover

[Gail Walden @GailWalden6]

It would be funny if i accidentally had more money

[Albie Darforyu @Fly_Malcolm_X]

Holy shit

[Andrea Russett @AndreaRussett]

i’m one mental breakdown away from getting a puppy