Janelle Van Gordon

omniscient narrator.

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

Life hasn't been the same since Coco's closed down

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@iamtiffunny We did it again!! 🍾🍾🍾

[tiffany @iamtiffunny]

#NewProfilePic

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@iamtiffunny It's call depression now

[tiffany @iamtiffunny]

I genuinely thought he was buying me a stocking 😪🎄 #Epsteindidntkillhimself

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

Some days the gift of life itself seems like the ultimate blessing...other days it's sitting in a public restroom, with another introvert next to you, in god awful silence waiting out who's gonna cave first and leave blue butt

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

Saw a pic of someone's kid holding a sign that said 'Class of 2032' and instantly got diarrhea

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

I'll never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever be able to thank my parents enough for raising me in Coolafornia

[tiffany @iamtiffunny]

please keep my sister in your prayers tonight she went to the doctor today and found out she has a little nostril

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

People always asked me how I manage to stay so "chill" and it's easy, one, I'm anemic, and two, I hum the music the miis on wii would intermingle to wherever I go, 24/7. I find it soothing to my soul like jazz is for others

[tiffany @iamtiffunny]

I’m on my way to the oldest standing @McDonalds should I order

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@katiemauritho !!!!!!!
!!! !!! !! !!!!! ! !!
!!! !! ! !! !!! !
:')

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@grl_pwr_666 @KylieJenner @KylieJenner

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@CNN @iamtiffunny

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

I call this one "the-friend-who- always-wants-to-karaoke-A-ha's- smash-hit-"take-on-me"-but-doesn't -get-you're-suppose-to-sing-not-whistle"
You all know that friend.
Some might be that friend.
Others might not have friends and that's ok too.

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@iamtiffunny I can't get on board with the new sex-before-marriage Jonas brothers

[tiffany @iamtiffunny]

any graphic designers out there who can help with a project?

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@lizzygibbons04 Get there early and put gorilla glue on the seat. You didn't learn this from me.

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@iamtiffunny 19 more years of celibacy and this will be a documentary of my life

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

You'd think with all the studying STEM kids do they'd know humor is vital when keeping attention, but here we are, TWENTY nerds deep in presentations, and Not. One. Chuckle. Not one attempt. I ain't in clown school anymore man :(

[Janelle Van Gordon @Swell_Nells]

@JoceyDonut I like it because it lets me imagine I'm looking at a pic of myself and damn! We be looking hella cute lately! Thanks dude. I live vicariously through you now