A highly autistic guy goes to a club, making erratic Elon Musk-looking movements while stuck in his head thinking, “How should I move?” It’s all incredibly awkward and cringeworthy, but to the chronically online, this is what fun looks like. @Clavicular0
I don’t want to get angry and feel like I’m losing control but in that moment it’s so hard to not lash out.
I wish I could stop myself from making bad impulsive choices that hurt myself and others but at the time it feels like the right thing to do.
I justify my shitty behavior and say it’s apart of my job.
There is some truth to that but it doesn’t excuse me to be a bad person or a mean guys.
I am a nice guy who is actually very soft but I feel like when I’m nice or let my guard down people press me or take advantage of me.
So instead I put the mask on everyday, but I don’t want to put it on anymore because I’m almost 37 and I’m tired.
I’m sorry and I love you and everyone who reads this.
I think I’m bi polar, and that’s not even close to the worst of it.