TuckerDallyJohnston

actor, voice over artist, dog enthusiast, self proclaimed human muppet

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

@canigetaHANDler Gurl you know you my favorite. Miss you too!

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

@BrendanMilove When I first saw this I thought you had photoshopped a hippo to a fish. Nice carp tho.

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

#BarstoolBestBar #BarstoolWheel My brother told me to do this so here we are. I’m confused. But I’m also a great follower.

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

Dear Day after tacos body,

This happens like twice a week. You should be used to it by now. Man up. #tacosforlife #tacos4lyfe #imgonnadieofanulcer

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

Her: Do you think I could pull off brunette?

Me: You are brunette.

Her: That doesn’t mean I can pull it off.
#youknownothingjonsnow

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

Update on my toilet paper. It has officially gone missing. Someone please call Carmen Sandiego. We got a real mystery on our hands. #seriouslydonatetoaustralia

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

The ladies at the post office have been trying to track down my package of recycled toilet paper for 20 minutes. That’s what I get for trying to help the Earth. #Justdonatetoaustralia

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

Last night a woman passed out at work from exhaustion during a show. As we were helping her my inner monologue was saying “what if she’s patient zero?!?!”. I need to stop watching zombie movies. The woman is fine btw. #timessquarezombieapocalypse #worstplacetobe

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

Why are people buying sunglasses at sunglasses hut in Times Square at 1 in the morning. #confused #ihatetimessquare #greatestcityintheworld

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

Hey the internet! This is a wonderful story that I got the opportunity to lend a voice to. Check it out. Shout out to @cbradleyowens for masterful writing and to @A4APublishing for giving an untested voice a chance. #AudibleApp https://t.co/fl8xUnP3bX

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

@TristanJMiller1 You hatin on the Renaissance game bro?!?!

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

@TristanJMiller1 Easy.
Walker? I hardly Texas Range(her)!
Then you roundhouse kick.

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

@Meriverian The story is so good it makes my job that much easier. Can’t wait for the rest of the world to read/hear it.

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

We’re cooking with fire now. Some kind words from a great author. @Meriverian makes it easy for me to do my best work. I get to read her amazing story. Best job I’ve ever had.

[Brandi Spencer (B. C. Marine) @Meriverian]

I was listening to some chapters from the audiobook of my upcoming novel, and narrator was so good, he made me cry!

Great work, @TDJdoingthings

#ASeersDaughter

[TuckerDallyJohnston @TJohn_Mustard]

This one’s for the guys!