The Devil

I’m basically a woodland fairy except I shoot whiskey and curse a lot

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

Reasons bartenders hate you: a thread. SADDLE THE FUCK UP Y'ALL.

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

Is it weird to ask my friends their blood types? I thought it would be endearing 🤷🏼‍♀️

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I wonder if my cats bitch about me in meow-meow right in front of my face

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

Sometimes I need to hype myself up first the smallest things like ugh instead of succumbing to falling asleep on the couch, you went UPSTAIRS? Brushed your TEETH?? Took your clothes off and put them in the hamper??? To sleep in your BED????

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I’m having myself a “Treat Yo Self” day in a week, I have a nail appointment, my best friend got me a massage gift card for Xmas, and I just preemptively spent $250 on new books & legos & candles & wine & skin/hair care products but IDGAF I’M SO EXCITED I COULD CRY

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

As a Vikings fan I’d like to never hear the word kick ever again in my life

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

This game is drunk but I’m here for it #Skol

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I’m working an insane amount of hours this week, I started my period, a friend died yesterday, I had to ban someone from the bar last night, and I started nosebleed gushing in my Uber to work and I am SO OVER EVERYTHING SOMEONE SEND ME SOME DAMN AFFIRMATION

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I join my Zoom therapy exactly one minute late every week so that she doesn’t think I’m over anxious but also it gives me very much anxiety being late to things but also I need her to think I’m 💅chill💅 do I bring this up in therapy

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I really need people to stop dying on me man it’s really bumming me out

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I’ve never been more excited for Halloween than I am this year, I have 3 costumes locked and loaded for working homecoming Halloweekend and for going to dinner on the day of and my friends will hate my dumb costume but they’re my friends so they have to be seen in public with me

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

It’s really a bummer losing a best friend. It’s been months but it still hurts like it was yesterday. I know he isn’t interested in my friendship anymore. Not really sure what to do.

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I threw my back out for the first time and I’d just like to say this is some grade A bullshit

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I really need a pick-me-up as I’ve been quite down and pretty burnt out lately and I don’t know how or what kind but if anyone has any suggestions I’d love to hear them

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

OK FACEBOOK CAN FUCK ALL THE WAY OFF WITH THEIR RECOMMENDATIONS 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I’m sorry but “super cozy management” is an oxymoron

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I did laundry, scheduled a therapy appointment, made myself lunch, and ordered my lizard his roaches today BEFORE going to work for 16 hours NO ONE TELL ME I’M BAD AT BEING AN ADULT OK TELL ME I’M DOING A GOOD JOB

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

Me to my dnd players this morning when I have done no prep and they’re asking if we’re still playing in an hour:

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

Ugh I need a new tattoo

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

Omg lactaid are you… flirting with me…? 🥵❤️

[LACTAID® @Lactaid]

@TaylorBKobb We're happy to always be there for you! ❤️

[The Devil @TaylorBKobb]

I just wanna give a real quick shoutout to @Lactaid thanks for always being there for me when I need you, like after a bowl of Mac n cheese when I have more than a five minute drive to not shit myself, love you boo ❤️