TechCrunch Onion

Silicon Valley's Finest News Source.

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Area Hockey Stick Tired Of Being Associated With “Bullshit Vanity Metrics"

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

With no CEO or COO, Uber Is Closer Than Ever To Becoming A Self-Driving Company

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

BREAKING: Youtube Acquires Yahoo To Improve Search

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Meet the Controversial Silicon Valley CEO Who "Prefers Customer Dollars to VC Dollars"

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Leaked Marketing Presentation Reveals A Truth We All Knew: “There’s no secret to growth hacking. Just spam like crazy."

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Company Tweet Still Waiting For First Like From Non-Employee

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Peter Thiel donates an entire season-long story arc to HBO's "Silicon Valley"

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Virtual Reality Industry Already Being Disrupted by Mixed Reality Industry, Which Can Project Fake Revenue into the Real World

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Area VC Jealous Of How Fast Super Bowl Commercials Can Throw Money Away

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Santa Claus Replaced By Self-Driving Sleigh

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Star Trek Fan Accidentally Accepts Job Writing "Enterprise Software"

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Foursquare Announces That It Still Exists

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Average Stripe Employee Will Hit Drinking Age in 2015.

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Startup Founder Devastated To Learn That Users Are Not Rational

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Apple Proud to Announce New Version of iTunes Is Hardest To Close Yet

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Q: How long does it take to get from San Francisco to Oakland?

A: Depends if you have rent control

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Google Covers Buses in Fur, Sends 8,100 Employees To Burning Man

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

BREAKING: "Growth Hacking" now means same thing as "Marketing"

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

Evernote hits major milestone of 100 million syncronization conflicts

[TechCrunch Onion @TechCrunchOnion]

#Hashtag is the new "air quotes"