Decided to take an absolute flier today. People love to crush me when my parlays lose. So this is a “don’t complain when it loses parlay” because it’s a bomb parlay. But I do love it. #dkpartner
Put @pinkwhitney vodka in that sword and it’s a totally different story. I swear. Don’t bully Whit over this. That much beer’s going to give his pussy a yeast infection.
Bold Spring Break House prediction. It’s day 5 on set in Vegas. It’s 3:30am yet the party is just getting started. I’ve been dead sober filming a drunk Dante all day while also dealing with him being legitimately upset with me for recording him on a reality show. I don’t want anything on the sidelines with us to distract him from the real game, so
I swallow my pride and ask him to forgive me for doing my job. He accepts my apology then gets back out there on the dance floor with the rest of his cast mates. I go to follow but see that another producer already has it covered. I sit back down and let out a sigh of both pleasure and relief as I crack open a Red Bull.
I’m looking forward to a 2 minute break from the action when suddenly I hear a voice next to me say “Mind if I get first sip on that?” It’s Mintzy. I have zero reaction to his question and I can’t tell if it’s because I’m in a state of shock or because I’m not shocked at all. He repeats the question, “Would you mind if I took a sip of your Red Bull first, I just don’t want your germs ya know?” I don’t say anything at all because I have nothing nice to say. He thinks I can’t hear him so he stops a bottle girl with a full tray of shots in her hands if she could tell the DJ to turn the music down a little. He gives her the option of dropping off the shots to her table first, if she wants.
I’ve been staring into the abyss the past 45 seconds while Mintzy stares at me staring into the abyss. My eyes are uncontrollably twitching but wide open, a small stream of blood begins to drip from my left nostril. Mintzy notices. He repeats the question then places his hand on my shoulder and says “Hey, I get it man. Now you know how I feel whenever I’m the only sober one at a party. The worst part about it for me personally is when I get forced into listening to drunk people talk my ear off about nothing.” I collapse.
I’m now lying on the ground of a nightclub in the fetal position with my eyes wide open, sober. The paramedics eventually come and Mintzy goes out of his way to tell them that he was talking to me just a second ago and I seemed completely fine. He watches me get strapped to a stretcher as he asks the paramedics if they think I’ll have to spend the night in the hospital. Wow, I thought, maybe he does have a heart after- and before I can even think the rest of my thought he turns to my concerned coworkers and whispers, “If Danny has to spend the night in the hospital then I call dibs on his bed tonight.” He quadruple checks that they all heard him, then takes the first sip of my Red Bull.
Trade: The Miami Dolphins are sending Minkah Fitzpatrick to the New York Jets in exchange for the 2026 seventh-round pick from the Chargers, per ESPN sources.
The Jets will sign Fitzpatrick to a three-year, $40 million deal, per his agent Drew Rosenhaus.
Panthers franchise legend Cam Newton returned to Bank of America Stadium today to be the team’s honorary Keep Pounding drummer. Panthers owners Nicole and Dave Tepper welcomed Newton and his family to the stadium a short time ago.
Players in NBA history to average 25/7/7 in a season:
Deni Avdija (through 36 games)
LeBron James
Michael Jordan
Larry Bird
Nikola Jokic
Russell Westbrook
Oscar Robertson
James Harden
Luka Doncic
John Havlicek
Avdija turned 25 years old today.