If you left an unhealthy relationship but went back, don't shame yourself. It takes an average of 7 attempts to leave a trauma bond for good. The back-and-forth isn't weakness; it's a normal part of untangling a complex web. Every try counts.
detachment starts
when you stop making him the prize.
you stop asking,
“why doesn’t he choose me?”
and start asking,
“why am I choosing someone
who makes me feel this unsure?”
that question will wake you up.
I used to think that holding your tongue was a sign of maturity, but l realized that a true sign of growth and maturity is being able to vocalize your feelings in an appropriate manner even if you are angry. Holding your tongue just fosters unexpressed feelings that lead to trauma being stored in the body.
taylor swift was right..
“the more i gave, you'd want me less. i cannot be your friend, so i pay the price of what i lost... and what it cost. now that we don't talk.”
Arguing with somebody who twist everything you say will wear you out quick. you say one thing, they hear something else. You express how you feel, now it’s an attack. Somehow every conversation ends with you defending yourself instead of fixing the issue. That’s when you realize, it was never about understanding you, it was about controlling the narrative.