Tha Disney Critic

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

Y y’all want Elsa 2 have a girlfriend so bad? Y’all know what her fingers capable of.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

The Rock is a gr8 choice 2 star in da Jungle Cruise movie cuz of how he seamlessly blends action n’ comedy. Let’s just 🤞🏻the movie ain’t 2 educational.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

guess the target audience for that olaf short was the 1 kid in the theatre who laughed when he shit a hot fruitcake

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

Coco is a whole movie bout musical skeletons n’ not once does someone play their ribs like a xylophone.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

Hercules is an incredibly inspirational and important movie for any white man who was born a god.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

incredibles 2 takes place immediately after incredibles 1 which means the wounds from 9/11 are still hardcore fresh

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

coconut pirates prolly attack Moana cuz they pissed her tribe brutally murders their cousins (then make their nets from the fibers)

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

any1 else shipping the Genie & "still I think he's rather tasty" lady or just me?

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

2 say Lafou is 1st gay Disney character is 2 ignore the twinsestual undertones of Cinderellas step sisters

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

Disney make independent new feminist Belle an inventor then only thing we see her invent is a washing machine.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

Moana is the story of a disabled chicken who just wants 2 die, living in a cruel world that just won't let it.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

Was he named Sneezy 'cause he sneeze all day, or does he sneeze all day 'cause his name Sneezy and he feels an obligation 2 live up 2 it?

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

U think sometimes Rapunzel misses long hair because when she want something across the room she can't just do a hair lasso?

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

If 90% of the population in Zootopia ain't got opposable thumbs who the fuck building all these skyscrapers? I can't buy into this world.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

I can believe that monsters go 2 school 2 learn scaring but I CAN'T believe it's a University. Thats a 2-year vocational program, tops.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

jus tell me who tha fuck MADE all them Cars & then I can enjoy the movie.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

where does Jesus fit in the timeline of Good Dinosaur?

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

mr & mrs potatohead could benefit from couples counseling. no shame in that. it helped my friend Courtney's parents work thru an affair.

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

never saw jungle book looked 2 educational

[Tha Disney Critic @ThaDisneyCritic]

how did Jafar even get that job? If I interviewed him I'd be like "sir you couldn't look more evil & I'm going with another candidate"