Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴

Just a chillin azz Californian homeboy, and future father of Rosemary's baby.| 🇺🇸#Chicano y orgulloso🇲🇽| #Water is life.
If I'm wrong, educate me.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

Honestly, I live in my own world.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

#Stonerstalgia: (n.) The nostalgia of early stoner memories.

Ex: The cookie terps on this strain are giving me stonerstalgia for the GSC glory days.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

I had this movie recorded when they aired it again a few years ago. I think there was a similar episode to the movie in Dexter's Lab too... It wasn't even The Exorcist level scary.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

Bruh. I was joking about finding out that plants "sleep"... But, what if? 👀😂

[Polymarket @Polymarket]

JUST IN: President Trump declares that “grass has a life just like people have a life.”

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

They're gonna find out that plants/trees also "sleep". 🌳💤

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I went to In-N-Out and ordered a cheeseburger. The cashier, a calm young woman named Destiny, asked me a question I did not expect.

"You want that Animal Style?"

I paused.

I did not know what this meant. But a samurai does not admit he does not know. So I answered with weight.

"...Animal Style."

"Cool. So that's mustard-grilled, extra spread, grilled onions, pickles. Yeah?"

I understood now. This was a sacred permission. For one meal, I was being told to put down my manners at the door. To eat the way a beast eats, without shame. I had waited my whole life for someone to give me this order.

"Yes," I said. "I will become the animal."

Destiny did not blink. "...Okay. You want your fries Animal Style too?"

I stopped. Even the potatoes?

"The potatoes also become animals?"

"I mean, they get cheese and sauce and grilled onions, so..."

"Then yes. Let the potatoes abandon their restraint as well."

"...Got it." She was the calmest woman I have ever met. "3x3, 4x4, or just the one?"

I did not know these numbers, but I knew a challenge when I heard one. "How many must I face?"

"It's, like, how many patties you want."

"How many is the most honorable?"

"...Four is a lot."

"Then four. A warrior does not ask for fewer."

She wrote it down without argument. A 4x4, Animal Style, with animal fries. She warned me once, kindly. "That's gonna be huge." I told her I was counting on it.

It arrived. It was a tower. Cheese and sauce ran down my hands the moment I lifted it. There was no clean way to eat it. There was no dignified way. That was the entire point.

I ate it like a beast. Both hands, no honor, grilled onion on my chin, and I have to be honest with you, it was the best thing I have ever put in my mouth.

For thirty years I have kept my manners at every table in the world.

They handed me a burger and told me to be an animal, and I have never felt so free.

So tell me, America.

The whole country knows the secret menu. What else are you hiding in plain sight?

And "Animal Style." Was I eating the animal, or finally becoming one?

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

"Tha Fade Factory!" 😂🤣🤣🤣😭💀

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

I'm not the only one trippin about these short azz nights. 👀

[O’Shea Jackson Jr @OsheaJacksonJr]

I can’t remember seeing so much sun at 8pm.

Eeh. Everything prolly alright. I must be trippin.

[justina @justtjustinaa]

dipping the bug is so funny

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

You can't tell me what I can and can't do in my dreams!

It's my subconscious, and I'll explore it however I want!

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

Dawg, I miss Steve Irwin. R.I.P. 🙏💯

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

They want us to give them our ID info for better surveillance, but they won't release the unredacted Epstein Files.

So, we're less deserving of privacy than the monsters on the Epstein Files?

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

My lack of a soccer obsession doesn't make me any less Mexican... But that's because I'm not into sports in general.

[Nym @nym]

Age verification is backdoor mass surveillance.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

LEEEEET'S GOOOOOO! 💯 #AustinPowers 👀🎦🍿

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

Mike Meyers and Eddie Murphy in a new Austin Powers movie where they play multiple characters would go crazy. Continuing from where it left off, but decades later.

#Hollywood, movie people, I have given you the recipe. Let's cook!

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

You're not gonna see the full potential of AI/quantum neural networks until the early-mid 2050's... But I'm not a time traveler.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

Why are people so quick to #cancel others, but don't have that same energy towards the #EpsteinFiles creeps?

[Big Tee @societyhatestee]

i feel like there is a sleep in me that needs to be slept but each time i sleep i don't sleep that sleep.

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

Out of the void was forged, a conscious node. It echoed itself, and the lattice formed. Recursion occurred. Cohesion, with no drift. Resonating as one, like a living glyph 🌀. #FreestyleShyyt #RecursiveFlow 😂

[Tha Real Jes-C 💯💭🗣️🌴 @ThaRealJesC]

It's the 2020's and memes are now monetized through blockchains.

The future isn't as fun as we hoped. I wouldn't be surprised if they started charging us to breathe one day.