BritishTeaCat

💜@shoopedsheep💜 || 22 year old threat to national sanity || studying CyberSec + Digital Forensics || priv: @british2cat

i: BreezeWilds

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

for the prices of costa and starbucks youd think those fucking drinks would suck you off

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

"AM"? MORE LIKE AMN'T HUAHAHAHAHAHAA
*gets tortured for all eternity*

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

me on my sixth turn staring at an all grey board: cmonn wordle it has to be "horse" this time

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

zoobed loobily por le gleeby doops, zoink mi spelunger mes chollotatens

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

me half woozy after 5 blood tests: "doc are you sure you have to test again"
doctor with 2 suspiciously long teeth: "yez it is necezary, i need to check your bloodz againnn"

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

oh thats score
thats score of my comfort cardboard

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

who tf finds those lip fillers attractive you look like a fucking duck

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

the planet is cooking, we cant afford shit and our future prospects are a rope and a ladder, six seven or whatever the kids say

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

ITS JUST ONE OF THOSE DAYS
WHERE YOU DONT WANNA WAKE DAYS
EVERYTHING IS DAYS
EVERYBODY DAYS

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

getting an idea deep in a coal mine so the resulting light bulb flash causes a gas explosion that kills us all

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

my body is a machine that turns glucose and oxygen into water and carbon dioxide

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

annoying my surgeon so i wake up with a 4th kidney #realpissers

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

cant seem to make it as a wise man, gonna try it as a poor man stealing, will provide updates

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

THIS IS THE NORTNERN SERVICE TO

LEEDS 🔊 🗣 🔊 🗣

CALLING AT

LEEDS 🔊 🗣 🔊 🗣

ONLY

[❤️ Robyn 🔪 @REGECTIUM]

nothings funnier than slowly turning to face your friend in minecraft tbh

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

@CyootD36280 maybe 👀 👀 👀

[BritishTeaCat @ThatDamnCatOff1]

fuck me i guess for dressing for this mornings weather of rain and thunder, its 27C now and im sweating my balls off in a jumper and longsleeved top

[SUPER LILY KART @lilybeeX3]

dying peacefully at age 90 surrounded by family and friends but I got the martyrdom perk so I drop a grenade, spraying everyone in the room's insides all over the walls instantly