Lauren

Dog Momma | Cat Momma | Writer, Reader and Dreamer | Just trying to save the world

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

Where they found #humor, she found ignorance. She knew she needed new friends. She had outgrown these ones, and as sad as it made her, she could no longer vibrate on their frequencies. Theirs were too low, while her own soared. She was light. It was best to say goodbye. #vss365

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“Yeah, I know. Ice cream should be eaten slower than that.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“If you have an issue with her farts, you gotta go through me.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“Sometimes I have two ritz crackers in one bite.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“Jon Snow rode a dragon. Don’t focus on a guy.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“The Zi-ons are trying to eat the li-bras. The zi-ons gotta go”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“What was his name again? Pube?”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“It’s been 12 long years. And now I’m Hitler”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“If you don’t know your tire’s popped on your motorcycle, you’re an idiot. There’s only two of them!”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“What does Jesus have to do with cocaine?”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“It just popped out like a cassette”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“You look like somebody that likes corn.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“All poops can be pees. But no one else in the area needs to know that.

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“Swines that’s swine together get the swine flu.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“You’re intelligent, but you’re not smart. You’re one of the dumbest fucks that I know.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“Thor is the hammer guy. And now he has one eye and no hammer.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“The desert ain’t got shit on me.” (In terms of water availability.

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“They call me Bulk in the bedroom.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“I don’t need the man face.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“You haven’t seen me spread my butter.”

[Lauren @TheBostonLegend]

“Wait. Do we like Putin?”