Elliot Mess

On an adventure, but misplaced my map. Writer, photographer, and lover of the Oxford comma. Lip balm bisexual. ADHD extraordinaire. She/Her.

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

The name of my cat:
Hugo

What I call my cat:
Hugobutt
Hugonaut
Dude
Asshole
Bastard
NononoNO
Youfuckingfuckfuck

[Headquarters @HQNewsNow]

Vice President Harris: Donald Trump is increasingly unstable, unhinged, and seeking unchecked power. His National Security Advisor, two Defense Secretaries, his former Chief of Staff, and his own Vice President are all warning America that he is unfit

[Headquarters @HQNewsNow]

Fox host: *plays clip*

Vice President Harris: With all due respect, that clip was not what he has been saying about the ‘enemy within’ that he has repeated when he's speaking about the American people. That's not what you just showed

Fox host: Well…

Vice President Harris: You didn't show that. You and I both know that he has talked about turning the American military on the American people. He has talked about locking people up because they disagree with him. This is a democracy. The President of the United States should be willing to be able to handle criticism without saying he'd lock people up for doing it

[Gary Parrish @GaryParrishCBS]

Alex Rodriguez asked a question. Reggie Jackson answered it.

(Shouts to the producer and rest of the desk for staying out of Reggie’s way and just letting him talk. I doubt they expected this answer. But it’s a great few minutes of television.)

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

@trimet Props and big thanks for your quick planning with the Bookpocalypse at the warehouse and setting up shuttles and getting me back home! 🫶🏻

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

@SenJeffMerkley Senator, please fight for the Affordable Connectivity Program! Internet access for Oregonians is vital for our continuing health. Our clinic of Medicare/Medicaid patients relies heavily for telehealth. Having Internet access is also vital for job training and finding resources.

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

@RonWyden Please fight for the Affordable Connectivity Program! Internet access for all Oregonians is vital for our continuing health. Our clinic of Medicare/Medicaid patients relies heavily for telehealth. Having Internet access is also vital for job training and finding resources.

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

@PomeloGames I love Outlanders! Will the Steam version ever be released on Macs? I want to do the custom challenges.

Thank you for making this great game!

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

Just washed down my Xanax with an energy drink. We will see which substance will win. Fight! Fight! Fight!

[philip lewis @Phil_Lewis_]

A Pennsylvania State Police trooper abused his authority to have his ex-girlfriend involuntarily committed to a medical facility for mental health issues that he made up https://t.co/eFlBrlw8Jn

[Meech @MediumSizeMeech]

When I was in high school 38 year old Jerry Seinfeld was dating a girl in my year and he picked her up from class during 4th period and she got to skip Mr Solinski’s calculus exam (I got a 93/100)

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

i know their PR team told them to sit in front of an innocuous normal-person looking wall, but unfortunately for them i have also watched their architectural digest house tour and know exactly where this was filmed

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

Props to the people who wrote this health history form. They also had a spot for pronouns and I am loving how inclusive and understanding the form is- not only for queer, trans, and non-binary folk, but also for people who have complicated/abusive family histories

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

ashton kutcher co-founding a campaign to end child trafficking but writing letters of support for his serial rapist bestie is such a great encapsulation of the way people love to fight against their imaginary idea of what abuse is but not what it actually is

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

I know at least one thing he can do with his money

[Elliot Mess @TheElliotMess]

Do you have regular anxiety, or do you have “listen to speaker at Apple Store event because the idea of him presenting without an audience and with no one paying him any attention fills you with such second hand anxiety that it makes your skin crawl” anxiety?

[brandon wenerd @brandonwenerd]

I read Jimmy Buffett’s memoir, Pirate Looks At 50, when I was in middle school - at that age when you start to get interested in the grown up world.

In it, I found a Tao.

Rest easy, Jimmy. You did this sonofabitch called life very very right.

[Don’t Boo…Revolt! @BreeNewsome]

Our nation is strong because the rich politicians who are forcing increasing numbers of people into homelessness nationwide still get along fairly well