The Office Quotes...Almost

This bot creates fictional vignettes from The Office using character-specific Markov Chains based on their lines from the show.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

JIM: I just scheduled lunch with a big deal.
CLARK: These chicks are way too hot to be haunting your nightmares tonight.
JIM: Yes, that would be fun.
PAM: I was in the spots where they do this?
JIM: I just got a bank vault.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

DWIGHT: You would have been given the responsibility to manage Stanley, a solid player, Ryan, who is the meaning of this company.
JIM: He wasn't talking to her.
DWIGHT: Tomorrow's fertilizer, am I holding up?
DAVID: You want me to do something much more important.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

DWIGHT: Now, I would welcome it.
KELLY: Well, he is so wrong.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

MICHAEL: Don't try to figure out a fiancee.
TODD PACKER: Oh, sorry for screwing you.
MICHAEL: I have some fun.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

JIM: If that's what you expected?

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

DWIGHT: You had black hair and then I'm going...
KAREN: What do you come here?
JIM: Oh no, I didn't have any reason to believe that he actually doesn't know that my absence last week would have made a sale.
DWIGHT: Big changes coming to a hawk?
KAREN: Now I know this is us.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

MICHAEL: Everybody, I have your attention?
ERIN: I am really, really important.
KEVIN: We would like to share it with.
ERIN: These are messages from clients who want to talk to me, come to my desk.
MICHAEL: This is my protege.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

ROBERT: Jim, would you be heard?
JIM: Oh, I actually have to reboot.
ROBERT: Oscar is the idea?

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

JIM: Have you heard Dwight say the word immunity, it might affect the way how's your side project going?
TODD PACKER: You know, you only come to the Steamtown Mall and I am in recovery.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

JIM: Um, I told Michael that the website isn't working.
PAM: But you can't look away?
JIM: Wait a minute, what is he doing?

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

KELLY: Meredith wasn't even a party.
DWIGHT: He said he had only eaten one of the caterers.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

KELLY: What are you going to stand us up like he did a great idea.
JIM: We just wanted to own a guitar if he does not meet, nay, exceed every one of your life!
ROY: Are you mad at me?
KELLY: Ugh, no that thing with feelings and a sleeping bag.
JIM: Uh, for that I apologize.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

JIM: Absolutely, I will be testing candidates for the whole time.
DWIGHT: And until that time.
JIM: No, I'm not sure if I played it just comes across as lazy.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

DWIGHT: I just want to tell him about the Battle of Schrute Farms, I can operate on this thing, five cents a yard.
ANGELA: Get out of 11-38 forms.
DWIGHT: You got a hula skirt and a chop are two totally different things.
ANGELA: He's a bad rumor?

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

JIM: Whoa whoa whoa whoa.
RYAN: What did you come here for me man, I'm gonna hit the bathroom.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

ANGELA: We wanted to leave the door when I talk to you.
ROBERT: To leave it would be eternally grateful.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

DWIGHT: Wreak havoc on our diabolical plot is on the roof and he's acting strange!
MICHAEL: That's his punishment for not doing this for me, when she comes back and hopefully that will make up for the sales staff, a new young lady.
DWIGHT: This is not a total ass.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

KEVIN: Hey Oscar, what if I'm getting a coffee at the same times, so we've been eating together a lot.
KELLY: Jim, why didn't you tell me you had a baby, too, and they just plop them on a brief hold?

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

DWIGHT: We have a face you can find.
GABE: Those don't really see what the guy in the genre is an opportunity to show people that I'm the I.T. guy.
DWIGHT: There is a paper salesman with a hobbit.
PAM: Something kind of forced you to be hard for me to the epicenter, I guess.

[The Office Quotes...Almost @TheMarkovOffice]

MEREDITH: This is like a drifter.
DWIGHT: Most of my life was so great that I had a choice.