The Dickums

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@jeremysmiles Hank Hill, named his dog after a democratic First Lady, went to yoga, made friends with carter, idolized willie Nelson, had an organic farm, & loved his son more than anything in the world. If Bobby did grow up to be a gay furry, Hank would be at the front of the pride parade.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@esjesjesj These guys are real strong at math. NY’s 14.7% ownership equates to 2.9 million people. MT’s 65.7%? 700K. Half that list are also the least populated states in the country.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@Sopee_ @yc Not the old fashioned coke I’m looking for.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc And try making it from vine ripe tomatoes and you’ll think you’re eating pasta with salsa on top.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc Your tweets hit, I mean not this one, but most of them do.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@StoneMtnFarms @cmclymer My first thought was somebody is going to fuck this

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@bomani_jones In Culpepper’s first 5 years he had 157 total TDs and in Brady’s first 5 he had 126. You think this guy would argue Culpepper over Brady because Brady couldn’t come within 30 TDs of Culpepper.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@locojotasfolyfe @yc I’m still in season one, so I assumed Pat invited all the whales to the ball but ended up sending all that food to the homeless shelter when no one showed.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@bomani_jones Bo being a real gentleman here by not even mentioning it’s the state of Iowa.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@Zachariahskylab @FromKulak This was my exact thought. How do you only understand percentages for half a sentence.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@dopeassdanii This exact thing crushed me at 37. I absolutely cannot imagine handling it a decade earlier. I’m very sorry. The one thing that keeps me moving is that they wouldn’t want me to be sad. They would want me to continue to have the best life possible. Easier said than done but I try.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@MarmotRespecter She really felt the need to call out a specific degree and decided to go with accounting. A profession so short on workers they’re making CPA licensure easier because they don’t have enough.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@anylaurie16 I originally read the first half as lifetime dementia and I thought she shit so hard she lost her memory.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc That top bar is not where I want jagged metal when using a leg press.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@StewMama71 @MelikAbdul_ @JesseKellyDC Customer service was one of the only priorities for airlines? Airlines?

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc My biggest take away of the last couple of years has been; yea maybe his family was right.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc I do remember you telling me the teapot was just a fancy way to get water everywhere. For some reason a squeeze bottle gives me the image of blowing up an already full balloon.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc I hadn’t considered until just now, but this implies a child having sinus issues, and wow. I’m a grown ass child with a little head pressure right now. I would have been a nightmare dealing with this at 6.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc You definitely put me on, but me being me, I proceeded to never take your advice. I feel like you mentioned the sensation, I just didn’t realize we were talking about something you had to talk yourself into.

[The Dickums @TheRealDickums]

@yc @NoEmmeG Hold on, it’s uncomfortable?