Brad and Julian

We're smart at sex.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Hey! We’re not dead, it’s just that a few years ago we heard that Jessica Simpson was working on a juicy tell-all and we passed out. Did anything happen? Anyway we read all 500+ pages - AMA!

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Worried about getting her preggers? Here's a tip: cum out your butt.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

@TrendFactorNYC tell that to lady gaga!!! Lol ;)

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Don't faint on a date. That's her job.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Make your wet dreams a wet reality: have an orgasm while you're conscious!

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Wanna set the stage for romance? Buy her a waterbed. #datetips

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

The most sexy hairstyle is spike it up.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

When it comes to down-there-hair, the carpet should always match the drapes, but the drapes should NEVER match the sofa. #pubefoul

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

First date tips: if there's a lull in the conversation, purse your lips and hum loudly to mask the sound of your constant stream of farts

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

The most sexy pants is shorts.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

The most sexy career is bullfighter.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Fellas, need to shake that crushing feeling that life is pointless and temporary? Go get laid, stupids.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

No one will blow you #2completion until you blow yourself #2completion.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

A man should never order salad on a date. Order pudding instead! If your date looks confused, that's just how she looks when she's horny

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Wondering if you're a bad kisser? Stop worrying and try this simple tongue exercise: prayer.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

The most sexy food is hotdog.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

#dickpics.org

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Don't get 'Catfish'ed. If your date looks like a catfish, she's probably a catfish.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Y'gotta be a wolf in the bedroom and a horse on the dance floor.

[Brad and Julian @TheSexGeniuses]

Treat your girl to a #romanticmorning by challenging her to an oatmeal eating contest at the crack of dawn.