lizard

life is not a malfunction

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Twice today I told customers on the phone "ok let me transfer you" then just hung up

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@hlars_ Same I’ll be practicing my lines before I get to the speaker

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

I can’t stand those mfs who don’t wear coats in the winter. What are you trying to prove

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@hlars_ Not all soups are stews, but all stews are soup 🤬

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Is it just me or are the mailmen getting sexier

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@hlars_ It’s time we get to the bottom of this

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Hellen Keller?

[my chetical romance @babesanburritos]

Wish so bad I could be a fake tan, long nails, lash extensions girlie but unfortunately I am exhausted

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

I suggest we take one of these bad boys to Mount Rushmore

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Just came into some money

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@KevinLevonyak You get it

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Every pop punk front man sounds like doodle Bob

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Who want him

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@J_Alexander_4 LOL

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

My cat is very happy with me right now because I gave him (1) one noodle

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

I come back to Rockford just to bar hop with my mom and leave

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Snow squall warning

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@lovelychspizza There’s not, I’ve tried

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Vote for me so I can pay my rent next month!! https://t.co/ZuLymaVC2q

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

Happy new year, time to finally apologize to me :)

[lizard @TheSmallerRock]

@brennaparson217 Brenna