Simon Wilson

Gentleman, Scholar, All Around Nice Guy... Lies and blasphemy! All of it...

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

The brain weasels have emptied my cutlery drawer, the hampster isn't in his wheel & there's a moron steering the boat... 🤦‍♂️

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

*remembers he has a Twitter/X/What-ever-the-shit-we're-calling-it-these-days*

Hi?

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx I shit you not, your post stacked on top of an advert. 😂

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

Got bored, started curating a Spotify Playlist of songs I used to listen to between 2000 & 2010... You know the "Formative Years".
Good god did I have a crazy range... Even if it was rock & metal exclusive. 🤘

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx YEAH! GET ANGRY!!!
(For context,no idea why... Just being a Chaotic Person)

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx Those are rookie numbers...

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

Nobody warned me of the logistical nightmare that is doing a piss in a urinal while wearing a tutu... Second time I've been in this situation and it still feels like low grade torture. 😂

#tacticaltutu #pisslogistics #slammer2024

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx Unplug it?

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

Today I have learned:
Tail lifts have safety features to prevent you turning yourself into a Short Range Tactical Dickhead...

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx He's not wrong though... 🤔

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx No... And if they forgot and do something infront of my truck they are treated to this ditty.

https://t.co/zMGqbiLLe8

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx Retail!
*jazz hands*

Seriously though, you should be able to ask but don't expect a "Yes"

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

Warm Diet Coke... It's like someone asked me to commit Sudoku immediately!

I know what I said...

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

People are only just discovering Cannibal Corpse (@CorpseOfficial) and getting offended by their lyrics....

Wait until this discover:
Infant Annihilator
Aborted
Anal Cunt
Dying Fetus
The Black Dahlia Murder
Vulvectomy
Putrid Pile

Basically anyone @RaisedByOwlsUK sing about...

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@BladeoftheS Someone was clearly desperate for a Sausage Roll...

Or maybe that window isn't patriotic enough? 🤔

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx You mean the same ones "protesting" alongside guys who are goosestepping & throwing up THAT salute...

... Pretty sure a few have been spotted with a certain symbol tattooed on them too. 🤦

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

@xcrashandburnx To quote Helling Ultimate Abridged...

"It's fucking NAZIS!"

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

Today I have learned self produced dad bod goblin porn is a gateway to listening to Nekrogoblikon...

What ever happened to word of mouth or accidentally finding then on a playlist? 😂

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

Why is everyone obsessed with how we used to clean discs in the 90s?
Am I missing something?

#HawkTuah

[Simon Wilson @TheSyborgenator]

HAWK TUAH!

... That is all