Matt

I gotta know before we start, are you an actual moron or do you just pretend to be one so you can play both sides, feigning victimization while being the bully?

[Matt @TheTick247]

Hey @JasonReitman, @C_Jsorrentino (@babyBelushi on insta) may just be the young John Belushi you’re looking for regarding your early years of SNL project.

[Matt @TheTick247]

ALL HAIL AARON! Patron Saint of #Mansplaining! #RHOBH #Realhousewivesofbeverlyhills

[Matt @TheTick247]

#socialdistancing #coronavirus #covid19 #selfisolation #quarantine #dontbedangerouslystupid #stayhomedumbass #homeiswhereyourassshouldbe

[Matt @TheTick247]

Yo, Peter's mom's side-eye/eye-roll shade is intense. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

oh, Pedro. You sly dog. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

I feel llike Mykenna's tongue is trying to make a case for itself to be named the next Bachelorette. It's getting a LOT of screen time for no apparent reason. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

has this fool not learned that giving out random roses completely alienates the group? Is he this oblivious? Too prone to being swayed by the producers? He's definitely beginning to seem like he's just way of his depth? #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

OMG. How amazing (and inappropriate) would it be if a group date was a dmt/ayahuasca retreat. Can you IMAGINE the drama of all the old issues that would get dredged up while they were all tripping? #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

Shooketh? #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

The ohio/cleveland slander is thick. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

Victoria F was on some other show and had issues like this, right? I'm not imagining that, I don't think. I thought she looked familiar. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

#champagnenetipot #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

I'm sorry. Are we not going to address the whipped cream and syrup that were suddenly present? #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

it is SUPER early for this many tears. Pace yourselves, ladies, or you'll dehydrate before week 3. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

wait. Is this guy a pilot? They should really make a bigger to-do about that. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

Savannah has drawn first cooties. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

More Victorias than a European royal dynasty. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

This girl's pun game is the best thing about this season so far. #TheBachelor

[Matt @TheTick247]

Your grandmother's name is Rose? My grandmother's name is Rose too! Wait a minute... #TheBachelor