Eric Winer

COMEDY WRITER: @heyitsopus funny 'writerz.' YouTube: 'Eric Winer's What I Did On My Pandemic Vacation.' LYRICIST: Bojangles Of Harlem: Stumptown Stages Portland

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@DellyDismantled Extended Starbucks run?

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@DarkMSolvent 'Lady Grape.'
'Foursome.'
'Escortfandel.'

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

'Lady Grape.'
'Foursome.'
'Escortfandel.'

[@MysterySolvent @MysterySolvents]

If Lindsey Graham were a type of wine, what would it be named?

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Who knew that 'Kumbaya' actually meant 'Go fuck yourself?'

[Late Night with Seth Meyers @LateNightSeth]

I don't know what Biden put in that fireplace, but hopefully the nuclear codes?

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

There's no right or wrong in our generation.
It's all up to interpretation.
Put a spin or a slant on any situation.
The truth takes a backseat -
to the best presentation.
Pull your head outta the oven -
and stick it in the sand:
Wake up, wake up man.
Wake up, wake up man.

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Sure the Internet is making me anxious right now but at least I just learned the best way to store apples so that they last a month.

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@elonmusk Fuck, right and off.

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@RobertKennedyJr F-off RFK, Jr.

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Trump's closing montage makes Johnny Cash's 'Hurt' video look like 'Walking On F'n Sunshine!'

What’s worse; Trump’s tired Rickles/Hitler mashup or his X-rated prop-comic shtick?

He mocked John Tester’s weight? Isn’t that just the-aberration-calling-the-mensch-a-rat-bastard!

[Late Night with Seth Meyers @LateNightSeth]

As Trump’s campaign ends, they continue to focus on the major issues affecting Americans, such as Kamala Harris’ laugh. #ACloserLook

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@LateNightSeth Trump's closing montage makes Johnny Cash's 'Hurt' video look like 'Walking On F'n Sunshine!'

What’s worse; Trump’s tired Rickles/Hitler mashup or his X-rated prop-comic shtick?

He mocked John Tester’s weight? Isn’t that just the-aberration-calling-the-mensch-a-rat-bastard!

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Fifty bucks says JD Vance changes his name again by Christmas.

@Satiristas @ComedyCentral @funnyordie

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Jill Stein is the Gus Hall of Lyndon LaRouches.
Or so I'm told. #LookItUp

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@WUTangKids Jill Stein is the Gus Hall of Lyndon LaRouches.
Or so I'm told. #LookItUp

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Greetings from Michigan!
Swing state.
Battleground state.
Militia state.

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Win or lose, I still get to tell Elon Musk to fuck off tomorrow, right?

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

A win today cinches my future grandpa name: 'Kornacki.'

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@TeamTrump It's like you're the fascist Alfred Hitchcock.

Hitchcock wasn't a fascist, right?

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

Popcorn? Check.
Cider mill cider? Check.
Fireball? Check.

Cued up 'Celebration,' 'I Gotta Feeling,' and 'Hava Nagila?' Not-yet-check, but check back with me later so we can read the room (and not just the tea leaves).

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

@MayoIsSpicyy You are not.

[Eric Winer @TheWeeklyWiner]

'William F. Fuckly?'