Tom Opiela

Singer, Songwriter, Pizza god

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Grab him by the presidency 💙

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Ever walk home in the rain and pretend to be in a music video? 10 out of 10 highly recommend 💯

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Bought a new cologne today and every time I smell myself I get a #HAP 🤤 (hard ass penis)

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

I can’t wait for the Kidz Bop version of WAP 😂🤣😜 @iamcardib @theestallion

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Some days I have really high self esteem... other days I look in the mirror and think “so this is what a wet fart would look like”. Today’s one of those days 💦💨

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

My mom bought me a sequined rainbow pillow. I’m gay, but I’m not joe exotic gay... yet

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Anyone else think @ladygaga sounds a lot like the actress from A Star Is Born ???

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

These #unemployment robots are more annoying than Chanel West Coast’s laugh 🙃

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Waittttt... soooo I’m making less money working, risking my health.... and people collecting #unemployment are making more than me ??? 🤯🤯🤯

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Feelin frisky, might dance with a bowl of cereal🥣 #milky

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

That’s a LOT of @tacobell 🤤🌮🖤

[Jeffree Star @JeffreeStar]

I’m going to give away $30,000 to 1 random person who retweets this tweet AND follows Twitter Philanthropist @Pulte and Me!! (If you don’t follow us, we can’t DM you the money) Will show proof! Much love

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Time to fold the dishes

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Weighed myself and didn’t lose anything this week. Pooped and lost a pound... still counts 🤣🙃💩

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Why am I oddly attracted to Eugene Levy in @SchittsCreek ... 🤷🏽‍♂️

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Demi thoughhh🖤🖤🖤 That was my super bowl

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Staff party tn! Hope I don’t get #fired 😂🤣🙃

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Found #vegan queso... today’s gonna be a good dayyy

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

Was 85% sure that my Uber driver who dropped me off at work today, sat at a table hours later... it wasn’t him and I need to stop watching the show @YouNetflix 🤣😂🤣 #YOU

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

@disneyplus I keep getting “code 83” on my Mac

[Tom Opiela @TommyTracks]

@Jaclynhill When @nicolconcilio uploads a video sayin she’s “too scared to wear or swatch your lipstick”... then 9min later says she’s disappointed cause when she swatched it the formula was there... 😂🤣😂 We love you, you got this, and I can’t wait to see you grow from this🖤