Calvin

Dont take life too seriously, you wont make it out alive!

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Talk about reminiscing about the good times about yourself and the absolute disgraceful times about yourself on twitter.

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Let a pregnant woman and get kids ahead of me in a queue , they didn't say thank you so I gave her an abortion

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

My first tweet since 2020 but @metronomy when are you gigging in Perth ? Asking for an Irish enthusiast

[Fionn McCool McCarthy @FMccarthy97]

Roy of the rover bars were ahead of their time

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

@Lum0794 Lol

[Liam Gallagher @liamgallagher]

@DToohill Yeah wrote a bit of a choon the other day it’s called I’m gonna grow my hair in peace it’s gonna take 7 months at least and while I’m out of work I’m gonna learn to twerk I’m gonna grow my hair in peace you get the drift

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Why do oul lads think nobody can hear them when they fart? Like John i can hear you absolutely shit your pants don't look at me like that

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Upping the East link toll by 33% and parking to keep up to date in government funding #absoluteballox #keeponsqueezinglads

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Don't trust people who put socks on before their underwear

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Ariana Grande is a c**t

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Ben Dunne is just ruthless on fly fit

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

My mama said to get things done, don't mess with major Tom

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Good man

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

I'm not scared of spiders or rapists but If i was scared of anything it would be downing a carton of gone of gone off milk #heebygeebys

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Of gone of gone

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

First tweet in a long so Im just gonna state that Bruce/caitlyn/it jenner looks like a brick layer in high heels

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Nothing worse when ya get a custard donut and realise after the first bite there's no custard in it #damyousupervalue

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

@cathalmurray17 Your mas gaf yurrrrrr

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Can't wait to go camping.. surfin... swim with sharks... stab an octopus and what not this weekend.

[Calvin @TotallyCaaaaL]

Avicii is pretty leveled now #tosoon #RIP