Asshole-in-Training

Currently reading 'Asshole for Dummies' by Donald Trump

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

What more can I say? He is the new 'Special One'. https://t.co/DEigWaUUyv

[Piers Morgan @piersmorgan]

Mourinho doesn't win PL for 7 months: FIRED
Ranieri doesn't win PL for 9 months: FIRED
Wenger doesn't win PL for 13yrs: NEW £20m CONTRACT

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

@trapafasa Good morning

[♡Liz ✨ @RawkinsLizzie]

God is the best listener. You don't have to shout, nor cry out loud. Because he hears even the silent prayer of a sincere heart.

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

Helluva song! https://t.co/YU94EjnAPp

[sarah 🕸♡ @VampireGhuleh]

It doesn't take two seconds of your time to show people you care about them. Spread love, kindness, and compassion. The world needs it.

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

Nigerian philosophy: I think, therefore I scam.

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

A man goes to a library and asks for a book on suicide...

Librarian stares at him for a while, then asks: Who's gonna bring it back?

[The Onyedịka @foevarr]

@nyaccunizik

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

Somewhere in Kenya...

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

If you think there's nothing better than sex, you've never had a cop turn on his lights behind you then pull over someone else

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

The best way to smuggle drugs is to place them up a dog's ass.
if the sniffer dog suspects, the officials'll think they're just being frisky

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

Calabar people be like "I ron get alert, na Dog meat".

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

My Nigga! https://t.co/aIGmjmuvtL

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

Happy New Year to all, including to my many enemies and those who have fought me and lost so badly they just don't know what to do. Love!

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth Then it just becomes a soap opera.

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

I told wife how my resolution is to be a happier person
"That's lovely!" she said
"I'm glad you think so, Your bag's by the front door."

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

"Would you like me to slip into something a little more sexually exciting?" asked my wife.

"Oh yes please, " I replied, "how about a coma?"

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

:-) :-) :-) https://t.co/LoXym9yQBQ

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

1962 FIDEL CASTRO:I will not die until America is destroyed
2016 Trump is the new President of the United States of America!
CASTRO: well...

[Asshole-in-Training @TraineeAsshole]

Yeah! That shit belongs in the toilet. https://t.co/KRJsDH48ut

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

. @realDonaldTrump appoints 2 women to his cabinet.

I'm not surprised by this.

The Whitehouse isn't going to clean itself.

[Bob Kostic @causticbob]

After the opening of an abuse helpline, many footballer's have come forward claiming they were abused every week
Mainly Sunderland defenders