Blake Peterson

It's easy to be funny when your whole life is a joke

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

I never make the same mistake twice, I make it 5 or 6 times just to be sure

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

You know what they say, a beer a day is nowhere near enough, those are rookie numbers we're all better than that #BestBarRileys

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

@kenzie_knighten It was 😂

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

I called myself an alcoholic and a friend corrected me to alcohol enthusiast. That's the energy I'm keeping in 2021
#BestBarRileys

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

@_its__ME This tweet is so out of...left field

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

Being from California I'm always worried about the next drought, which is why I like to conserve water and drink beer instead #BestBarRileys

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

I don't know where beans come from

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

You can just buy a karate outfit on amazon and pretend to be a black belt. Real karate people won't fight you because they have honor

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

Do you guys think cows from different areas moo with accents? I like to think so

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

Just throw car batteries in the ocean, those eels aren't going to charge themselves

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

Wyoming just isn't ready for escalators, and that's fact

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

My therapist told me to fight these thoughts, didn't know my damn brain had hands

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

I'm happy, just asymptomatic

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

I don't like avocados because the toy in the middle is always the same

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

@juggerbear53 Amen

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

@paulgladman Guys I swear I'm not an alcoholic

[Paul Gladman @paulgladman]

“ I just drink fireball straight out of the bottle and call it a night “ - @Turbos_Thoughts #blakeoutofcontext

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

I would just like to say I'm proud of myself for successfully completing sober October. I didn't stop drinking or anything, but October is finally over so people will stop giving me a hard time about it

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

It makes sense that all these girls like spooky season so much when all they do is ghost me

[Blake Peterson @Turbos_Thoughts]

All my homies call me the 1930's because I be having a great depression