X-Pert Madman

If I ever woke up as a doughnut, I would eat myself. Wouldn't even question it.

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

When you tell your bud you're craving a caramel frappe from McD's and he replies with "You should only crave Jesus".

[Bill Simmons @BillSimmons]

Sending nurses, chefs and therapists to @HousefromDC ‘s place

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

Crazy night. Watched National Treasure 2. Still holds up.

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@Big_Show94 @scottcreps The public needs to hear this

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

Crazy night. Watched Ratatouille. Still holds up.

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@scottcreps Love a good Lohan vehicle

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

I hate baseball. I love it so much.

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

Horrible call. I’ll allow it. #Dodgers

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

Can’t believe I’m going to have to kick my newborn out of her nursery to make room for this thing

[LEGO @LEGO_Group]

9,090 pieces. 1.3 meters long (4 ft. 5 in). One LEGO Titanic building project! https://t.co/guhn2isu17

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@RyanE_Cary Congrats bro!

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

UV rays every time they see my exposed skin at the beach...

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

Didn’t know Southwest catered

[ESPN @espn]

Troy Daniels shared what dinner looked like the first night inside the NBA bubble.

(via @troydaniels)

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@Variety @Big_Show94 People are starting to murmur...

[Madeline Roberts @madeliner0berts]

“I like the smell of camping, but I don’t love the taste.” - @TypicalTrevor

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@Big_Show94 Me when I saw the pick

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@espn @Big_Show94

[Madeline Roberts @madeliner0berts]

Trevor while sipping his coffee and staring out the window of our house (a frequent occurrence these days)

“I want our grass to be as green as our neighbors...

how do they do it?

What do they do that I’m not doing?”

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

I think I purposefully blocked this game out of my brain, and now I’m furious all over again.

[Bill Simmons @BillSimmons]

This sequence is iconic — a red hot Kobe makes an unbelievable 3, Lakers get a huge stop, then Smush inexplicably goes into “I GOT THIS” mode as Kobe watches in disbelief.

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

@zoe_lu You know, it’s a fair complaint

[X-Pert Madman @TypicalTrevor]

Day who-really-knows of quarantine: I just stared at a tree outside my window with my arms folded and said “It’s trying to bloom...”