Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester

Bush ‘04 | 9x champagne and shackles champion | 1985 Nobel prize winner | BO2 T-Bag Warrior | Flop enthusiast

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Huzz in the portapotty next to me is railing lines and I’m laying a stinker #GoHoosiers

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Who the fuck decided this was a monument? Chicago must be #nuked

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

What my daughter doesn’t tell me about her new boyfriend

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Drake in 2026? Queue the Nets KG edit #ass

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Got my shit sucked by a mixed girl so good that I decided to make a treck up to give thanks to the man who made it all possible 👊

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Tugboat as a nickname is fucking nails

[Jeff Passan @JeffPassan]

BREAKING: The Cleveland Guardians are acquiring two-time Gold Glove-winning catcher Patrick Bailey in a trade with the San Francisco Giants for the No. 29 pick in this year's draft and left-handed pitching prospect Matt "Tugboat" Wilkinson, sources tell ESPN.

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

@EdwardUlys30328 Get that thing in the paint!

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

The #aphis paid for the table now on sugar daddy mode and the card feels like it’s in Amex mode

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

@EdwardUlys30328 drinking 15 of these for you tonight. God bless Busch light Apple

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

@omalleyskis Happy to hear that snowman. Don’t forget to have your rejects send ole captain provider a message！

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Retarded question from pops #shrink

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

My pecker after losing my manscaped

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Goin straight from Paul Walker to John 3:16 Tebow? This guy is the greatest athlete ever

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

It’s official. No one dominates their field like Tiger Woods.
PGA Tour - Get fucked
Cheating on his wife - Had to go to sex addiction class he was gettin so much strange (PATRIOT)
Pill Poppin - He ain’t singing the national anthem backwards
Driving from A-B - He is speed.
GOAT

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

@EdwardUlys30328 Special special talent here Jeff. Congratulations

[Jeff “bag” Bagwell @EdwardUlys30328]

And with the first pick of the 2026 draft, AEPHI will select…

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

This KU St Johns game is like watching a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob #marchmadness

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

3 liter tower, have to take down two like it’s ‘01. #neverforget

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

White women discovering rich white guys who play hockey are conservative is like retards discovering they love grilled cheese #duh

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Loyal faithful,

This place needs a Walmart Supercenter, A Menards and my favorite local shell gas station. Shout out Raj #missyou

Salutations,
Senor Provider

[Gerard “Unit Provider” Lanchester @UnitProvider]

Bruise on the leg is a hell of a long way from the heart, candy ass. #USAHockey