Taylor Swilley

This account is for 2 things: 1) writing down funny shit that I think of 2) trying to shame companies who are ignoring me into providing customer service.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@DirdyBongWater This is awesome, do you have an IG? I’m never on Twitter but I would love to follow you on there.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@ICYMI_pod Oh I 100% do!!

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@iamstephbeatz @hotelsdotcom She’s always talking about going to Provincetown :)

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

Litter-Robot is giving away a Litter-Robot 3 Connect each week this summer and I'm entering to win! Are you?! https://t.co/HZGJxvFZGn #scooplesssummer #litterrobot

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

Farting in a nail salon is pretty much the best. Who’s going to notice another weird smell?

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@WholesomeMeme Y’all look gorgeous. Congratulations! 💙🤍💕

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@helenraw As an actor... there is nothing out of the ordinary about this except the first photo is a bit ruder than you’d normally get from a CD. That’s the way breakdowns are. I’ve seen worse, too.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

This is so me

[𝔸𝕟𝕕𝕣𝕖𝕒 𝕃𝕚𝕓𝕞𝕒𝕟 @AndreaLibman]

Fave pastime: reading about books I want to read (instead of reading the book I’m reading)

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@imnottayediggs 100%

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

Today I told my acupuncturist I was upset cause I gained weight and she said "that's all just patriarchy malarkey" and she gave me a sticker with a cat wearing sunglasses.
I love her.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@Voice123 Thanks!!

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@Voice123 Are you experiencing site issues? I’m getting “Network Error” messages, then the site kicked me out and I can’t even navigate to the login screen. :(

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

@yogawithadriene It was a great practice! I needed to take things sloooowww and it was just the right speed. Also Benji is ❤️.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

#Yoga is dangerous. I slipped and fell on my yoga blanket and almost broke my mug of soup and spilled my mashed potatoes.
#newyearnewme

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

Summer me: “Why do I have an entire drawer of socks??”
Winter me: “How do I have so few socks??”

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Next time we have a gov shutdown, Congressional salaries should be furloughed as well.

It’s completely unacceptable that members of Congress can force a government shutdown on partisan lines & then have Congressional salaries exempt from that decision.

Have some integrity.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

Needed this myself.

[TheLatestKate @tlkateart]

If you're struggling with #depression , please know that being unable to feel the love of others doesn't make it less real.

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

I like this quote. But what I like even more is that someone printed out a tweet. And then someone else took a photo of it and posted it back onto the internet. #tweetception @WarrenBuffetHQ

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

Kitties tell you they love you by rhythmically stabbing you with their feet. And you just like have to take it cause they love you so much. #cats

[Taylor Swilley @VictoriaSwilley]

One of the best moments on #GBBO is when people add salt instead of sugar and Paul eats it without knowing. 😀😂🤣