Viz Vuz

[lexi @elextra__]

strip clubs should have open pole night like how bars have open mic night

[Jeff Brown @jbrown_tc]

Who says no?

To DET:
Matt Boldy
Brock Faber
Kirill Kaprizov
Quinn Hughes
Joel Eriksson Ek

To MIN:
Dylan Larkin (half season loan)

[Cranky Federalist @CrankyFed]

Your pub's flag isn't on the moon

[Kliff from North Loop @NorthLoopGuy]

Wife just said “I don’t think it’s a good idea you start drinking vodka already this morning” okay terrorist.

[Rock @TheCensoredRock]

I wish my girl Reagan lived long enough to see America’s 250th birthday. She loved this country (even though she was black)

[❥ 𝑪𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒆 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒔 ❥ @tonyhawktruther]

*rubs my big Amelia Earhart-shaped belly and burps*

[Michael Holmstrom @MichaelH_MN]

I maintain that in Minnesota there are no illegal fireworks. Simply undocumented fireworks with a strong work ethic.

[Kameron “KY” Yung , DDS @DaveFreese6]

A guy at the pro shop today said that his “swamp ass is so bad he was hydroplaning on the toilet seat”. Never heard that one before. May be adding it to the bag.

[Gus @Banjo761]

This morning's coffee is so black it just punched Caitlin Clark in the face

[Viz Vuz @VizVuzJr]

Why do women have vaginas if they won’t let me in them?

[AC 🇲🇦 @AC2802M]

Thank God it’s not snowing imagine shovelling snow in this heat

[greg @gandalf_thegreg]

toddlers to people with deformities in the grocery store

[323 @Ggod323]

The stripper could like me tho

[pinkpanther @pinkpanther4056]

WR1: route-running genius made of glass
WR2: indestructible retard

[refriedbuttsects @refriedbuttsect]

just invented 𝐩𝐞𝐞 𝟐 from looking at boobs

[Viz Vuz @VizVuzJr]

@SkyrimLifter

[evan.. @dogparkranger]

i think she's using me for my terrible looks and bad penis and no money

[Minnesota Wild @mnwild]

RT if Matt Boldy

[NHL Trump @trump_nhl]

The Dallas Stars should be deeply ASHAMED of the ass kicking they received last night against the very STRONG Minnesota Wild. Most games were very tight yesterday, yet the sleepy Stars didn't show up to play. Fans in the GREAT State of Texas deserve much better, and are in very BAD moods today. I am closely watching liddle' Glen Gulutzan, as choking in the playoffs would be TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE! NHL PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP

[Old Man Rattle @OldRattleMan]

going fregley mode on her plastic raspberry tickle bear