mom mom mom mom mom

i would love a high quality grilled cheese sandwich and a nap.

[Tony Hawk @tonyhawk]

1/2 In order to better understand the provenance of a “unicorn” skateboard I acquired last year, I found the original owner. Today (Kurt Cobain’s birthday), we are offering photorealistic versions of this deck in the form of actual skateboards, prints and stickers all for charity

[✨No Context Paul✨ @nocontext_paul]

Anyone?

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@Mithril_Maker @palehilarious ??

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@Mithril_Maker @GregoryEck 😑

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

Forget Disney movies’ unrealistic expectations for romance, Beetlejuice set unrealistic expectations for parents. Why can’t my moody, dramatic teenager summon ghosts who can help her attitude and grades. And get her to enjoy Harry Belafonte.

[Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻‍♀️ @maryfairybobrry]

Me- Good morning
13- I can lick my armpits
Me-
13- Watch this

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@punkboy12345 Hear me out: 3 but a beret.

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@DJcookie777 Pulp Fiction

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@Acidic_Blonde High Fidelity or Long Way down both by Nick Hornby

[Mom On The Rocks @mom_ontherocks]

Husband: WHAT IS THIS?

Me: I call it carefully organized chaos

Husband: Make it stop

Me: Be nice, she’s our daughter!!

[jon drake @DrakeGatsby]

If you get bitten by a shark, bite it back. You’ll still probably die but the shark will be like “lol what”

[Quilliam @nyquills]

when i don't respond right away: i'm busy, they'll understand

when someone takes more than three minutes to respond to me: wow ok judas

[jon drake @DrakeGatsby]

Even if the government uses the Covid vaccine to somehow “track” us, I’m not worried. They’ll stop when they see how boring I am. “He’s eating pizza for breakfast again.” “Oh man he’s watching TV from the opposite side of the couch?” “He bought a book he’ll never actually read.”

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@Mythical Ren And Stimpy

[Mom Jeans @momjeansplease]

Got a full 8 hours of anxiety last night

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@CrockettForReal Lol I had brothers they weren’t judging me silently that’s for sure. 😆

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@ThatEricAlper Whistling.

[mom mom mom mom mom @Vstilt]

@ThatEricAlper Beastie Boys