Wigifact

You know when you go upstairs and forget what you've gone for? Then you go back down, see the flames and remember you're a fireman? Like that, but different.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Some more #Owls. See, it's better already. #Springwatch

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Terminator Genisys was never as good after the liquid metal-based Phyl Collyns took over from the original exoskeleton-based Pitir Gabryal.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Today you'll get an extra second - completely free! Sadly, you've just lost it reading this. #Leapsecond

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Instead of Spider-Man reboots, how about 'Man-Spider'? A spider who does whatever a man can. In the first film he buys a toaster from Argos.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Some #Owls... because life's better with owls. #Springwatch

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Blind man's buff. He must work out.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Overheard two people talking on a bus:

“I think he’s listening to us”
“He’ll probably post this on Twitter. We better say something pithy”

[Wigifact @WFv2]

@dd_opco I'd definitely watch that!

[Wigifact @WFv2]

@PBeeodd Ha, true :)

[Wigifact @WFv2]

I've had to open a brand new box of Christmas crackers to keep this account going :)

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Lord Byron sometimes wrote under the nom de plume ‘Biro’. That was his pen name.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

@IAmSimonHarris Ditto. Loved Rentaghost. Think Ben Stiller bought the rights.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Isn't it time for a big Hollywood reboot of Stig of the Dump?

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Life is like a boxer’s chocolates. Don’t eat too many or he’ll punch you.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

I want to breed a panther with a cheetah and if the offspring’s female, dress her in Spanish clothing and call her Señorita Panthercheetah.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Have i ever thought of a name for a powerful dinosaur? Mightadon.

[Wigifact @WFv2]

@Freckleface12 Cheers, Frecks x

[Wigifact @WFv2]

In a care home far, far away...

"I used to be a Jedi, you know!"

"Aw, that's nice, love. Eat your Weetabix."

#RealisticStarWarsSequels

[Wigifact @WFv2]

"We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And ghosts. And spiders. And ghosts of spiders." - Franklin D. Roosevelt #ImproveAQuote

[Wigifact @WFv2]

Bought a fish tank, but my fish says he’s a pacifist and he refuses to drive it.