𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐.

❴. . . . . . .❵

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 『The day my father Odin banished me from Asgard, I was bitten by a vampire and had radioactive waste dumped into my eyes. To make matters worse, my mutant ability to control weather activated just as I was hit by a blast of gamma radiation.』

『comic. rp』

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — Shulkie, all you had to do was ask.”

He notices the figure as soon as he stops talking, and raises an eyebrow, only evident by the small curl of his mask. “Is that Darth’s grey matter cousin, or...?”

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀“A Green Lawyer, A Red Romantic, and A Plotline Walk Into A Bar...”

{@TheIronArmor}

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — then real quick if he needs back up. He skips along behind her, whistling sharply at people in the distance and making it clear they need to walk the f#%k away. It leads him to walking into her back, full body, and he can’t say he’s complaining about the contact.

“Jeez, —

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — to the chaos ahead of them, the tip coming dangerously close to her leg in his dramatics. “After you, my Green Goddess.”

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — Which is a shame, because a beer is really calling his name right about now. He reaches behind himself and pulls two katana swords from their sheaths, bringing them to his lips to kiss gently. “Uno. Dos. See? I’m all set.”

He bows low to the ground, gesturing with his sword —

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — we’re here for interplanetary, multi-dimensional, studio deal, Independence Day stuff, right?! Is bank robbing really our business?”

Maybe he’s biased. He has, on occasion, been the bank robber in question.

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor “Just so we’re clear, this /on top/ of a Paul Rudd reference has me incredibly aroused.”

She pulls him along like a rag doll, but soon enough they stop. When she let’s go of his hand, he reaches to hold hers again, even though he’s knows it won’t end well.

“Now, now... —

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — as I am here?”

[@TheIronArmor]

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — he tosses himself down, hooking his thumbs onto his utility bag and turning towards the explosion spot. He holds out a hand to help She-Hulk down, knowing she won’t take it.

“Our romantic duet wasn’t meant to be. Wanna give me the 411 here, Shulkie? Or are you as clueless —

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor [@TheIronArmor]

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — “Sharsies? Gotta warn you, I’m a crooner. ABBA brings that out in me.”

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — a woman in love. But really it’s just for a chance to squeeze her green bicep. It’s as big as his head. He never tires of her. But boy oh boy does she tire of him.

“So, is this your home universe, or are you dimension hopping too, Shulkie?” He asks casually.

[@TheIronArmor]

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor He’s dragged bodily towards the stage and honestly, with muscles like that, he’s just along for the ride.

“Oh, goodness. This is just... all so sudden. Fine, I’ll do it, but only if you pick the song. It’s just too much pressure.”

He wraps a sneaky hand around her arm, like —

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — Thor as a woman? Will he finally get to pluck Howard the Duck? The world is his oyster!

[[@TheIronArmor]]

[𝑷𝒐𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒐. @WadeWilsonInc]

@TheIronArmor — /like/ me in your universe, don’t you!” He gasps, prancing over to hug her tightly. Overkill? Potentially. He’s just so damn excited. It’s not like she can’t stop him.

What other fun things is he going to run into? Captain America as a Nazi? Iron-man as a little black girl? —