Jordan M.

I’m holding out on this bio for some divine inspiration give me a few. (UTSA 22)

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

happy birthday to all you fathers out there

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@cosmicassie but it DOES make it more exciting when u finally agree

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@cosmicassie we can put a blowup pool in the bed of my truck

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

psa: sonic 99 cent mozz sticks

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@shimmerybaby watch u some new girl

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

wow i can’t believe it took me all these years to find a decent role model
https://t.co/0sq8ukxcJk

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

me, after spending like five minutes with someone’s dog:

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@shimmerybaby imagine dragons is Good don’t let john shame u

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@cosmicassie too much power

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

the closest we’ll ever get to time travel is going to an ihop @ 4 AM and drinking way too much coffee while you work

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@TheBromaid ((hatch))

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

i would like everyone that has to read anything i’ve written in a professional or academic context to know that i haven’t proofread a single thing in my life and I’m Sorry

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@mahnameskarl @jmtrevino52 we keep telling him that

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

me vs the part of my brain that wants to take turns @ 35 mph

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

why is it so COLD im just out here trying to scream at the void

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@cosmicassie we’ll get matching tats

[Jordan M. @Watermoloneee]

@cosmicassie why did u make me read this