Shxde: “Nah fr, that shit’s nasty. Y’all lying to yourself—McDonald is the worst of the worst when it comes to fast food. And their ice cream machine never works. Me? I’m a White Castle man, plain and simple.”
BACKWHEN: “You know, 3-in-1 gets a lot of hate and it’s totally undeserved. Every time I use it I feel the freshest—and that’s all that matters right?”
VAVN: “No, I’m not pitted. My Ricks were just dirty from all the shoeys I did the other night. Also these shoes get way too much hate; you can be hating but at least your toes aren’t as cozy as mine.”
Hyperforms: “I woke up this morning feeling very hungry so I poured myself a bowl of cheerios. Unfortunately I did not open the fridge first and only found a can of Red Bull, so I just had to make do with what I had. Now I’m both wired and sad that I don’t have milk.”
Enjoii: “I’ve felt so congested today but then I finally blew it out. Unfortunately, I don’t know where the loogie went, and I just really hope it’s not on one of my clothes. I would hate to meet a bad bitch just for them to see a booger on my shirt.”
Just Connor: “I feel like I’ve let everyone down: my mom, my dad, just my entire family. I can’t believe I wasn’t able to carry the full shop in one go. Now the frozen are gonna be slightly thawed and the milk a little warmer. Ugh.”
Taco Tomago: “I’m actually just a huge fan of tacos and I wanted to pay homage when I created my project. I have a taco for breakfast, a taco for lunch, and a taco for dinner every day. It was just a typo, I don’t know how it took me so long to catch it.”
Bafu: “His meal alone cost him over a hundred dollars. All I had was a water a lasagna. I just think that’s not cool, man.”
Altare: “Everyone knows the rules of eating out with friends, you always split down the middle. Not my fault he’s a broke bitch.”
Juche: “Everyone thinks I’m crazy but they haven’t slept in my bed. These monsters are scary as fuck and I’m not taking any chances. If the monster eats me, Skeler boy is going to take over my SoundCloud and post anime theme song wave remixes, and we all know we can’t have that.”