Wayne Reardon

Clowns to the left of me,
Jokers to the right,
Here I am

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

Today's attempted carjacking is proudly brought to you by @JacintaAllanMP, @BenCarrollMP and @VictorianLabor from Melbourne, Victoria - The machete capital of Australia

[Sky News Australia @SkyNewsAust]

A 16-year-old boy has been charged after allegedly threatening a woman with a machete and attempting to steal her car at a Victoria shopping centre. https://t.co/IR2mcl3ZJ2

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@JacintaAllanMP Can you please throw some more cash at us before you go? https://t.co/RDvJJz2Kzp

[The Australian @australian]

Premier Jacinta Allan faces the prospect of a wipeout at the November state election with Victorian Labor drawing up a list of more than 30 seats that are at risk. Read the full story: https://t.co/E6k72aF2IH

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@VanCityVice So Collingwood in Canada is just like Collingwood in Australia then

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@AlboMP @chrisluxonmp Is "jobs" your code for Indians?

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@AP So what are you in for?

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@SnipeMyles @trigeminy_henry They won't do anything. I once made a purchase and noticed my PayPal payment went to someone called "Harry Bigballs" so contacted eBay and let them know they might have a fake seller on their hands. They wrote back and asked me if I could prove his name was fake.

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@trigeminy_henry It's automatic, because you looked at the item. Now you buy it back using a different account and put in an item not as described claim when you receive it, and then return an empty parcel. You get your money back and he has to pay return postage.

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@dion_mccauley @nobl3savag3 or buy a backhoe and an AK and you don't have to chase anyone off. You'd spend a lot of time digging holes though.

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@andrewbogut I think Jay Leno should take a paternity test

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@Philip_DT @JeremiahDJohns My Labradors don't. According to their trackers, they are travelling 7-9 miles a day. I have the happiest and healthiest dogs I've ever come across and I put that down to the amount of outdoor time they have.

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@JeremiahDJohns Spot-on! I own two very healthy Labradors and live on a farm. I have Findster trackers, so always know where they are and can see where they've been. From that I know that they travel around 12-15km (7.5-9.3 miles) a day. Keeping big dogs in apartments is very cruel.

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@ScallywagRay @tonytardio Richmond Police are useless. Collingwood Police got rid of all the heroin dealers from Smith St 25 years ago, so they all moved to the Richmond side of Victoria St and the Police have done nothing. The dealers are still too scared to cross the road, as that's Collingwood's patch

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@NinaTaylorMP If I was going to a Halloween party as an out-of-touch far-left politician, I'd dress up as you

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@BennyScarf About 25 years ago a man was charged with that for farting while leaving a Police Station. His lawyer defended him by saying "Your Honour, passing wind is a natural bodily function", to which the prosecutor replied "Yes, but it's not natural to lift your leg while doing it"

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@AlboMP Cool! These people will be rapt

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@JustineBateman @spencerpratt It's amazing how quickly you forget. Look how clean it is compared to now. Those opening shots of Hollywood & Vine take me right back to drinking at Dillon's Irish Pub most days of the week. I always had great fun and never felt unsafe. Not anymore though

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@SophieC_FanClub @sophaller she knows how to use them

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

Lazing on a sunny afternoon

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@kevin_nealon But @DavidSpade won't be allowed on the rides

[Wayne Reardon @WayneReardon]

@KatyKray73 I love Nicole. I think she'll be elected Premier one day