This is hilarious! 🤣
MEMPHIS WOMAN ARRESTED AFTER LISTING HUSBAND ON FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE FOR $100 OR BEST OFFER
MEMPHIS, TN — In what experts are calling "the most honest Facebook Marketplace listing of 2026," a 47-year-old Memphis woman was arrested after allegedly putting her husband up for sale online with a starting bid of $100 or best offer.
The seller, identified as Tammy Sue Pickens, posted photos of her 49-year-old husband, Ricky Dale Pickens, standing in the driveway holding a weed eater he reportedly hasn't used since the Obama administration.
The listing described Ricky as:
• "Used daily but rarely for intended purposes."
• "Makes mysterious groaning noises when asked to take out the trash."
• "Factory-installed remote control only responds to sports channels."
• "Includes emotional baggage, old fishing gear, and three unfinished garage projects."
• "Needs software updates but refuses to install them."
• "Check engine light has been on since 2017."
Within hours, the listing went viral across Memphis, drawing more than 1,200 messages, 400 laughing emojis, and at least three marriage proposals from women who believed they could "fix him."
According to investigators, things escalated when one potential buyer asked if the husband came with maintenance records.
Tammy reportedly replied:
"No records, but I can tell you exactly what's wrong with him."
Another interested shopper asked if delivery was available.
Tammy's response:
"Only if you bring a trailer and promise not to bring him back."
The situation took a bizarre turn when Ricky learned about the listing after arriving at work and being greeted by coworkers asking whether he preferred being traded for a riding mower or a Blackstone griddle.
One coworker reportedly walked into the break room and yelled:
"Hey Ricky, somebody offered two pit bulls, a smoker, and four tickets to Grizzlies preseason games. You moving?"
Police say Tammy then began scheduling "viewing appointments" for interested buyers.
One prospective purchaser allegedly showed up carrying a tape measure, flashlight, and clipboard.
Neighbors reported hearing him ask:
"Has he always made that rattling noise?"
The highest offer reportedly came from a woman in Bartlett who offered:
• Two goats
• A used bass boat
• Half a freezer full of deer meat
• And a 2004 riding mower that "only needs a carburetor"
Authorities intervened after Tammy reportedly started creating a spreadsheet titled "Potential New Owners."
The Marketplace listing was eventually removed, but not before local residents began debating whether Ricky's trade value was increasing or decreasing.
As for Ricky, sources say he has changed every password in the house, hidden the Wi-Fi router, locked down the Netflix account, and is currently sleeping with one eye open.
Friends say he's also started checking Facebook Marketplace every morning just to make sure he hasn't been relisted under the category:
"Free Stuff — Must Pick Up Today."
Cliff Messer
She would not have bombed Iran.
She would not have illegally attacked Venezuela.
She would not have destroyed the economy.
She would not have pardoned criminals, drug traffickers, and traitors.
She would not have supported Putin's Russia.
She would not have slept in the Oval Office.
She would not have an affected hand.
She would not have cut the SNAP program.
She would not have used the DOJ to attack her political enemies.
She would not have given money to foreign countries.
She would not have abandoned American farmers.
She would not have prevented the release of the Epstein files.
She would not have destroyed American democracy.
She would not have trampled on the Constitution.
She would not have abandoned the fundamental rights of citizens.
She would not have deployed American soldiers against the American people.
She would not have destroyed the White House.
She would not have enriched her family through government influence.
She would not have lied about her health records.
She would not have played golf.
She wouldn't have asked people to cheat in future elections.
She wouldn't have said "Quiet piggy" to a female journalist.
She wouldn't have invited Putin to Alaska.
She wouldn't have appointed an administration of incompetents.
She wouldn't have done everything Trump did.
Don’t argue with people over sixty. Just don’t.
It’s not just an age; it’s a masterclass in survival.
They grew up without Google, without DoorDash, without therapy podcasts, and without an "undo" button. If something broke, they grabbed duct tape, WD-40, a hammer, and a look of sheer determination that made even the broken appliance second-guess itself.
As kids, they knew exactly what kind of mood their mom was in just by the sound of how hard she slammed the cast-iron skillet onto the stove.
They were the original latchkey kids — walking home from middle school with a house key tied around their neck, with strict orders to heat up lunch and not burn the kitchen down. By the time they were ten, they could bike to the corner store, buy a gallon of milk for the neighbor, feed the family dog, and still have time to play freeze tag in the yard until dark.
Their knees were a permanent canvas of scrapes, bruises, and rubbing alcohol. Their universal first-aid kit was just a quick wash under the garden hose and a Band-Aid. If a bone wasn't sticking out, you were fine.
They drank water straight from that same hose, ate Wonder Bread covered in butter and sugar, shared a single glass bottle of Coke among five friends, and somehow didn't die from a lack of sanitization.
This is the generation that knows how to rewind a cassette tape with a No. 2 pencil. They know the suspense of waiting all week for a movie to air on TV, because if you missed it, it was gone. They remember rotary phones, looking up a family in a massive paper phonebook, and the excitement of getting a color television.
They survived party lines, typewriter ribbons, early brick cell phones, and flip phones — and today, they might accidentally send you a 7-minute voice memo where the first 6 minutes are just them breathing and asking, "Hello? Can you hear me?"
And don't you dare laugh.
Because without a GPS, these people could drive halfway across the country using nothing but an old paper map, a cooler full of sandwiches, and the gut feeling that "the exit should be coming up somewhere around here."
They are the ultimate masters of household magic. They can stitch, tighten, glue, and fix just about anything. And somewhere in their pantry, they have a "bag of bags" that is literally older than half the gadgets you own.
Leave people over sixty alone. They saw the world before the internet, and they navigated the world after it. And through it all, they didn't just get by — they thrived.
The history of Iowa is defined by the courageous pioneers and crusaders who settled this land, tamed the soil, and put down roots.
It's the story of men like James Harlan - who fought to defend the land that Iowans built from the speculators who tried to take it.
I am running for Governor to carry on that legacy: Of Iowans who run for office to always put the people over the special interests.
Vote @ZachLahn
The people who built Iowa thought in generations, not election cycles.
They left us fertile soil, strong communities, and a state worth fighting for.
With Zach’s vision now it’s our turn:
• End Iowa’s cancer crisis.
• Give our young people a reason to stay.
• Put farmers before special interests.
• Keep Iowa land in Iowa hands.
Plant the seed. Do the work. Leave Iowa stronger than you found it.
If you weren’t able to hear @ZachLahn speech today at the GOP convention the links are in the comments:
This UFC spectacle at the White House, dripping with corporate sponsors and pay-to-play billions is crass corruption. While families struggle to afford groceries, rent, and healthcare, we’re watching Trump play Gatsby on the People’s lawn.
This grift must end. We deserve better.
“United we stand, divided we fall.”
The challenges we face won’t be solved by fighting each other - they’ll be solved by people willing to roll up their sleeves, have tough conversations, and get to work.
There’s a lot more we can accomplish when we stop looking for enemies and start looking for solutions.
United we are stronger. Divided we fall.
Thank you Republican Party of Iowa for standing together to put #IowaFirst 🙌🏼