Mr The Roofus

Furry. Limey. Mongrel. Bum.

[Chapter Master Valrak @CMValrak]

@TeamYouTube Please Help, Baldermort's Guide to Warhammer has been hacked and taken over (https://t.co/PfToPGk1wB) and the person has no way of contacting anyone at YouTube to take it back! Can you please assisst

[Joe Lycett @joelycett]

I’m devastated to announce my painting The Mona Lisa Scott-Lee has been STOLEN. I am speaking to my advisors and looking into this matter urgently. Will share more when I know more.

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

I hate when the sky box doesn't load on reality

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

Replace "modern britons" with "cunts" and this is pretty accurate list https://t.co/YrbKkIB3de

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

Anyone want to see what the bottom of a barrel looks like?
https://t.co/7SWMpM9upU

[Paige Siewert @thathockeygirly]

George Canyon’s beautiful rendition of, “Johnny B. Goode,” to wrap up the candlelight vigil for Johnny and Matthew Gaudreau.

[Jay in Kyiv @JayinKyiv]

How many times did Musk promote just one of these Kremlin agents?

ALOT.

[Ben Rosen @ben_rosen]

what is your biggest pet peeve?

tim walz: when someone’s going too darn slow in the left hand lane!

jd vance: the obsolete fallopian tubes of the postmenopausal female

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

"Please slow down, children live here"

Don't children like, live everywhere?

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

Stoner metal band names never fail to amuse me.

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

Sat in the doctors office realising that even though my appointment was at 4pm, the one doctor here is like an hour behind. Fucking yay.

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

@Rodentite Do I need to come in there and hold an intervention?

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

Ever been so bored at work you go for a shit, not cuz you need one, just as something to do?

[MeidasTouch @MeidasTouch]

A recap of the past few days

[Mr The Roofus @Whatupwidat]

Why do I get the feeling that we're only at the beginning of the plastipocalypse but that if we survive our time isgonna be the laughing stock of history.

"They even put this stuff ON THEIR DICKS! Fucken morons!"

https://t.co/LjFIpmzy2E

[Natalie Wynn @ContraPoints]

You should, at minimum, have to remove your Baphomet armor profile picture before being allowed to participate in the next satanic panic

[MrPaulRobinson @MrPaulRobinson]

"What is the charge? Eating a plant? A succulent garden plant?"

[Prof Janina Ramirez @DrJaninaRamirez]

The four horsemen of the Apocalypse