Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA

LSU’97 | Snizz Enthusiasts | Degen | Professional Retard | Song of The Day Merchant | Coors Banquet Advocate | Tequila Soda Slugger | Corporate Slave

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Ran into my ex in DC got some butt and the giants resigned Odell all was well but now god is punishing me with being sick as a dog and my car breaking down

If this is what it takes for OBJ to be a giant I will be the martyr @obj

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Yk that moment when u peel ur cheeks apart and it’s like opening up a PB&J hold the J

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Yk if I woke up and I was in the human centipede but connected to a chick with an absolute hess truck for a behind I’m not gonna say I’d be ecstatic but mad would be very much far from the truth

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

My ass always fires off like a machine gun once I’m in a bathroom that has paper thin walls

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Bout to start slapping my dick in my hand like a cop in the 50s

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

My height is very comparable to my dick it starts with a 5 but I tell people it’s 6 I’m bigger than the average but women still like to call me short and my uncle always tells me I’m bigger than my brother

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

@AddicusSapp I just can’t think of a reason that I’d have to get it out it out that bad

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

I’m hearing people actually do this so I wanna see

Have you cranked hog on a plane

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Some people just don’t get it

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Every time this song comes on I can’t even lie I turn into a bad bitch

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

@ArbyThesis 🪵

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Gonna put a no girls allowed sign outside my room so I have an excuse when my parents ask why I get no ass

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Women be talking about u need to open up to me you need to tell me what’s wrong. Bitch I’m just trying to slap it on ur tongue!

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Rudolph was a system reindeer

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

The things I’d do to get this chick

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Coworker keeps looking up the Epstein case on the work laptop dude must be panicked hes been checking everyday for the last week

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Yan fucking ML LFG

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Finally getting bad hangovers I’ve official reached unc status

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

Would you fuck me… I’d fuck me

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

@MorganSchoell What’s good shawty

[Willy Dong CPA, CFA, CIA @Willygooddong]

This is what I like to call the kys shuffle