Mike Willis

Western Mass. For Bob.

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

2020 : Alright before I leave, does anyone have any questions?

Me : Yeah uhh what the fuck was that

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

@AllisonLepine FUCKING SLAY QUEEN YAHS

[Matthew Richard @Mattcasey17]

Everyone hates nickelback until they’re alone in their car.

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Quick appreciation tweet. My first semester in college I took Psych and never took notes or paid attention. The final was an open note cumulative test. @imbreline printed out 24 pages of notes on wicked nice paper for me to use for it. I still failed the final and the course

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

*Me working as a cashier*

*Guy walks in with a gun*

Guy : Give me all the money

Me : Did I do something wrong?

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Alexa play ‘How to Save a Life’ by The Fray

[Jordan Reed @reedingjordan]

Bonus Pro Strat: If you get hot sauce in your eye the best way to wash it out is to just keep your eye closed for several minutes until the tears wash it out naturally. Opening your eye simply adds to the pain and trying to shove your eyeball full of water is ineffective

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Trust and believe, Love Story by T Swift just became my jam for life after seeing that shit live

[Matthew Richard @Mattcasey17]

@WsWillis95 K

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

You’re over reacting https://t.co/yroBvP9vEb

[Matthew Richard @Mattcasey17]

You find out who your friends are

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Unpopular opinion.... the beach sucks

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Can I put “Stopped Kony in 2012 by tweeting about it” on my resumé

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

I wonder what 10% Charlie is doing nowadays

[eric curtin @dubstep4dads]

my body: please... eat some normal food... maybe some vegetables... please
me: how about another slice of bread with a kraft single on it :)
my body: NO
me: ...ᶜʳᵘᶰᶜʰ ᶜʳᵘᶰᶜʰ ᶜʳᵘᶰᶜʰ

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

‘Ay Bay Bay’ just came on and I got an immediate craving for nachos with cheese and airheads, and I can only blame the middle school dances for that

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

My body is 50% caffeine, 30% gin, 12% honey roasted peanuts, and 8% cheese burgers at this point, and I’m okay with it

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

It would be so dope to be a pirate

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Allergies fucking blow

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

@Joe_Bodzioch I looked it up and they shut it down back in 2016 I guess. Truly the end of an era

[Mike Willis @WsWillis95]

Am I the only one that remembers texting Cha Cha for all of life’s answers back in the day? Was that even a thing or am I imagining it