Casey Shea

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

I wish the news was boring again

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

Feeling trendy!

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

@antoboros The movie that is almost as groundbreaking (and GROINbreaking) is Street Fighter... M Bison wants to make “Bisonopolis” by any means necessary. Even if he has to be a real jerk about it.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

Me: My feet are cold but not sweaty

Slippers: What if I told you your feet could be sweaty but still cold?

Me: ... I’m listening

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

Y’know what? I wish this whole pandemic thing never happened! There, I said it. #brave #sobrave #hero

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

@uhmeganwho I'm building up my fat to keep warm

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

The thing I like most about winter is that you don’t have to exercise 🙌🏼🙌🏼

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

It took me about an hour of trying to decide what to cook for dinner to finally come up with pizza pockets.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

I wish I could have ice cream whenever I want... wait a sec. I can! I’m a grown up!... if you have kids, tell them that Casey can have ice cream whenever he wants. I’m sure they’ll be happy for me.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

Sometimes I think I missed out on a little bit of my childhood because I never went to summer camp... but the they probably wouldn’t have let me drink, so fuck that.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

@uhmeganwho Hey!! Haha

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

You know what the saddest thing about a 38 yr old man making kraft dinner for lunch is?..... nothing. Stop judging me.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

To the guy that just drove by and splashed me with that giant puddle; fairly certain you did that on purpose, so I hope ants eat your face .

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

Picked up a six pack on the way home today and it’s Tuesday... can’t figure out if I’m becoming an alcoholic or if I’m just super fun.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

“Walking. It’s like driving, only slower.” - Casey Shea

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

I just ate Taco Bell and now my back hurts... this is the sign of getting older that I’ve been dreading for years.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

‘Hangin’ tough’ by New Kids on the Block is probably the best “tough guy” song in the history of music.... also, I’m drunk

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

You ever see someone wearing the same shirt as you and the thought crosses your mind that there's a chance that they broke into your house, stole your shirt and now have the audacity to wear it while grocery shopping?... Ya, me neither.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

It's Friday the 13th and our waiters name is Jason... I'd say that's as close to a perfect Friday the 13th as you can get.

[Casey Shea @Yardwolves]

Ever see your clothes on the floor and are like "what are you doing down there??" But then you're like "oh yeah, I put you there. Carry on."